Cancelling wedding a month before

I feel like cancelling the last minute would cause a lot of complains and hurt feelings from friends and family.

Some vendors has a fee if you break contract, you may need to weight the pros and cons.

Instead of cancelling everything (assuming you already have a lot of things purchased) can you do a court house wedding with close friends and family. Then have a back yard reception?

How many people do you have coming? Could you scale the reception down to someplace cheaper but have it on the same day? What about doing it at a restaurant?

View Quoted Comment So it’s a small wedding with 38 people. It’s at a restaurant already that has a private dining space. We have to pay per person for the food but also pay the bar bill which is based on consumption, plus the gratuity fee. It’s hard to know how much the bar bill will be but we can kind of figure out the rest of the bill. I’m unsure on how to scale it down even further from here, aside from getting rid of tablecloth rentals which we already got rid of.

View Quoted Comment That’s what we are afraid of, because a lot of people got plane tickets to come from out of town. We are still doing it about an hour away from our home, since we live in the middle of nowhere, so there isn’t a place for a backyard wedding (we live in a townhouse). So even if we did just do it close family, we are worried about others such as siblings and aunts and uncles and whatnot who won’t be able to come and hurt their feelings. We do have a lot purchased but we also only have the photographer as a wedding vendor, since the florals are paid for two weeks before and are not paid yet.

View Quoted Comment

You could cover beer and wine only on the bar bill. Could you limit the time with photographer just to one hour and a limited amount of photos? Either that or cancel the photographer? Is there a cheaper restaurant you could look at? What about changing the time to a brunch reception and serve just mimosas and caesars or Prosecco?

Could you pare down the florals or opt for a dry wedding/ cash bar?

1. I would contact your florist, explain the situation, and see what they can do for the money you have already put down (ie, don’t pay them any more!). Most vendors are understanding of extreme circumstances. If they aren’t willing to do something for the amount you have already paid them, just cancel. Florals are not a necessity.

2. Contact the restaurant and explain your situation. See if they have any options for you.
If the restaurant will allow it, have a dry wedding. That eliminates the bar bill altogether.
3. Contact your photographer and explain your situation to them. See what options they have available, whether that be reduced rates or reduced hours, etc.
Normally I would agree with you that you should cancel or postpone under the circumstances. But unfortunately you already have guests who have purchased airline tickets, which will be non-refundable. So I would do everything you can to make it work. Could you maybe explain to your parents what is happening and see if they could give you a loan?

I was going to say the same thing someone else said. Maybe have a wedding at the court house and then the reception in someone backyard or just at home or someone else house. Maybe ask family and friends to make a dish, bring drinks, plates etc.

Be aware that consumption bar is the most expensive option because there is zero oversight in what is served and what you are charged. Is that the only restaurant in your area that can fit your group? Also look into the parks department owned venues because they are cheaper. And you can have restaurant drop off catering. Consider a dry wedding and jazz it up with tasty mocktails.


You can get married on a strict budget but you have to prioritize and be willing to cut out things that you don’t care about.

View Quoted Comment Thank you! We are looking into just doing beer (since my family is strictly beer) and then doing some mock tails that my family probably won’t even notice don’t have alcohol.

We are paying for everything before hand so that we do not have to have the bills. Many vendors only seem to be interested in how much we can afford, and do not care that to us it does not matter how much we can afford, it is hw much we are willing to spend, period.

Do NOT allow the vendors to rule you. Take charge and change the venue or what have you to what you are WILLING to spend. Everyone will be happy to just be there and celebrate with you. It will be much cheaper to call or email everyone informing them of the venue change than it will be to forever carry the guilt of the plane tickets others have already paid for.

The ONLY reason to call off your wedding is because you are breaking up or there is an emergency. The only ones that will not understand, do not matter.

Did you have a contract with the restaurant? We didn't have our wedding at a restaurant but our contract stated we had to pay the full amount if we cancelled within 30 days.

I'd switch to public seating in the restaurant, or to a cheaper restaurant, and not provide alcohol

I would contact the restaurant. They may be able to put together a limited menu for your party (with options you know you can afford), and I would forgo the bar.

Contact your vendors and venue to see if you can postpone. Most of our vendors have force majeure in the contracts we signed. They allow for postponement with little to no penalty within 1 year of the original date. Vendors would generally rather someone postpone than cancel all together. Wedding guests would probably also take a postponment better than a cancellation.