Cancelled bridal shower help!!

Didn't the bride give you the guest list for the shower? I think the couple needs to decide what they want within the next day n get back to you...this shouldn't have been a last minute/after the invites are out thing....

No, people can't just be invited to the reception only. When is their wedding? They shouldn't have invited all of these people to a shower if they weren't going to be invited to the wedding.

I don't understand tiered receptions. Why would you invite people only to the reception and not the ceremony? The reception is the expensive part so you're not saving money. If they aren't special enough to witness the ceremony, why are they there to celebrate it right after?

My guess is you mean another tier, so not for food but invite them to the dancing after? That's even ruder than the first scenario. "You aren't good enough to witness my marriage or enjoy my meal, but come dance and bring gifts".

Where did you get the invite list? Did they provide it and now are scaling back or did you make it on your own? ETA: I suppose at this point it doesn't matter. I'd cancel and if you want to attempt again, make sure the list matches their invited guest list this time.

@CD...most tiered weddings I hear about in my area...some guests are invited to only the dancing portion of the reception thus saving the couple a lot of money by not hosting them to dinner (an probably thinking they don't have to add them to the drink pkg either. Not awesome; but seen it done :o

@ambrok, I meant more that I don't understand why people think they are ok agree on not awesome.

They probably should've communicated this to you a while ago. But you're wrong that it's okay to invite guests to only one part of the event. When is their wedding?

Oh my !

This seems a bit late to cancel now and it really should have been sorted out before invitations went out. And no, they can't just invite them to the reception, that's very rude

Wow now that is not a good situation at all. What a stressful situation to be in! I would cancel the shower entirely like he asked. You need to get an exact guest list from your friend. It's extremely inconsiderate if they didn't provide you with one previously. I wouldn't feel obligated to plan anything extra for them if that's how you're being treated, especially if you're the one who spent time and money on all the invites. Also, do they realize if the invites already went out, people may have already purchased gifts? It's so rude that they didn't let you know this prior to the invites being sent.

Sorry you are in that position. Don't push for a shower they don't want to have..

This sounds bad. I'm also wondering why the bride would give you names for the shower when the guest list wasn't finalized. When are they getting married?

Only invite the people to the shower you plan to invite to the wedding ceremony and reception

This is a tough one. You have already sent out invites for the bridal shower. I am assuming you have already received RSVPS. To then cancel it and then not invite any of them to the wedding is wrong. It is also wrong to invite people to a bridal shower and not wedding. I am assuming the bride had previously told you who to invite. They need to figure something out.

So did you just invite a whole bunch of people to the shower without having been given a guestlist? I feel like this whole situation would have been avoided with proper communication.

Cancel the shower... invites should not have been sent out until the bride and groom finalized their wedding guest list

Did you talk to the bride before you planned it? When is their wedding?

Thank you all for the input and helpful comments. Yes, I got the list of invitees from the bride for the shower. No, I haven't received any RSVPs. I know proper etiquette is bridal shower invite=wedding invite, but I didn't know if times had changed. She and her fiance are young. Her FH told me they were cancelling the shower. The whole thing is a mess and I'm just not sure how to do this properly; I just know it's my job to respect the bride's wishes. Oh, and the wedding is 8 October. And I don't believe they've sent invites yet.

I would cancel the shower and have them finalize the guest list asap! They haven't sent invites and the wedding is in 3 weeks! Yikes! I'm stressing for them.

@futuremrsn14 true