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Just Said Yes April 2021

Cancel big wedding???

Toria, on August 14, 2019 at 7:45 AM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 8

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We have our wedding booked for April 2021. We have planned for around 80 daytime guests. After a recent family fallout (which I was not involved) I have began to question if I want this large wedding which we will be saving extremely hard for. I have worked out that out of the guests on my daytime list I have only seen 23 of them in the last two years. My fathers side of the family have lots of issues which would make it difficult to seat everyone to keep them happy however I was willing to work around this. However there has now been a falling out with some cousins on my mother's side which is 2 of my bridesmaids (not yet asked) . I have explained to my OH that I want to cancel and get married abroad even with just us two but he thinks I'm over reacting?

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8 Comments

Latest activity by Jeanie, on August 15, 2019 at 2:41 AM

Savvy October 2020
Kaila · on August 14, 2019 at 8:33 AM
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What about you fiancées family? And friends? If you still want a “big” wedding you can invite whoever you feel you want there. My fiancee and I thought about going abroad. Don’t get me wrong, I think getting married abroad would be a fun story and you get your honeymoon in one. Untimely we decided we wanted to be surrounded by loved ones (not just family). You could always just do friends if you wanted.
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Just Said Yes April 2021
Toria · on August 14, 2019 at 9:46 AM
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Thanks for your reply Kalia fiancé's family did not show much enthusiasm towards the big wedding so I'm guessing they would not really mind either way. We only had 8 friends down to invite aswell so I suppose they could come abroad or to a smaller wedding. I'm now just trying to weigh up the pros and cons of both weddings types
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VIP October 2020
Kelly · on August 14, 2019 at 10:50 AM
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Why don't you do a microwedding with fiance's family and the friends? It'd be easier and less drama
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Devoted October 2019
Lara · on August 14, 2019 at 12:07 PM
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Just think about who you actually want to witness your ceremony and celebrate with you. Is it that you want numbers? Or do you only want those really close to you?

Also, you have some time. Maybe think it over and wait.
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Just Said Yes April 2021
Toria · on August 14, 2019 at 12:21 PM
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Hi Lara thanks for the reply I would love to have the whole family as my other cousins all had large family weddings in the past (before any issues between them). I even chose the venue I have, as it is a large mansion private for us all weekend - however I'm now thinking that it will cause me anxiety during the lead up and actual wedding as there is a divide between family members even though I don't have any issues personally. I would love to be able to just put it to the back of my mind but we have to pay 30% of our venue next month (around £6000)😣
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Devoted October 2019
Lara · on August 14, 2019 at 12:39 PM
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Wow - that is a big decision coming up.
Best case - the family works it all out by then and everyone has a grand time.
Worst case - family still hates each other and starts fights all weekend and you're totally stressed
Most likely - Family is alright and sucks it up for the weekend. You find a way to be relaxed, letting anything annoying they do not bother you. You marry your love and dance the night away.
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Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on August 14, 2019 at 2:24 PM
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I think you need to have the wedding you want. Your original date is far enough that you could scrap the large wedding without much issue. It really boils down to what you and FH want! You can't always bend over backwards trying to appease everyone!
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Super February 2020
Jeanie · on August 15, 2019 at 2:41 AM
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Your date is still a long time away. A lot of things can happen between now and then. If you have booked the venue and have some time to cancel, I would wait until the last minute to make up your mind. You and your fiancé should think about what you really want and what is most important for your wedding day. You’ll never make everyone happy, so may as well do what is going to make you the most happy. There is a lot of options out there, so why don’t you look around and try to envision how you want your day to go. Congratulations and good luck!
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