So we have been fighting lately A LOT. Fighting over small things, over insignificant things which are things we can move past but FH makes a hugee deal over it and it becomes a really big thing. This last wave of fights started because of social media. We both have flaws of course. Mine are my communication and fear of conflict and emotionally shutting down when we are fighting. His are that he’s unrealistic sometimes and he blows things out of proportion & has a nasty mouth.
(For those of you thinking we need counseling, we already completed 8sessions of premarital counseling & he does not want to revisit counseling or therapy again. He has the typical attitude of “we dont need it”)
But nonetheless we are not getting along. Everyday is something. The part im confused about is upcoming anniversary on June 4th. I really wanted us to elope to keep our date of the 4th and what better day to do it than our actual anniversary. Well idk what he wants to do and I dont know what I want to do. Yesterday was the first good day we’ve had. Idk. I already bought a dress just to be prepared if we elope in June, or if we elope before our actual ceremony in October.
Our October date is October 3rd, its only 5days from my birthday. I didnt want us celebrating our anniversary + my bday every year but now maybe I dont care. The date the 4th is really special to us and to me. But to move forward with June 4th feels rushing. Idk if that makes sense, we have been together 13years so not like we are rushing into marriage but I just ultimately want us in a good head space & getting along. Not fighting or trying to just be happy for the day & then something happens and we fighting again right after being married.
June 4th is a thursday. Some of our immediate family are still working and would need the day off. I feel rushed because we need to make a decision within a week so ppl can request the day off from work, and figure out who will be officiating.
Of course im going to talk to him but I want to figure out what I want first and I really dont know right now.
