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Alexis
Just Said Yes June 2020

Brunch wedding - no dancing?

Alexis, on May 16, 2020 at 4:55 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 1 17
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Has anybody been to a wedding that did not do dancing including the first dance? My FH and I both hate dancing so I thought we could have outdoor lawn games instead and play the shoe game in place of the first dance. We're having a small brunch wedding and the reception will last around 3 hours.

Originally our plan was to have brunch, do the first dance, father-bride and mother-groom dance, and then head outside for games. But now I'm afraid this will make the day too hectic and busy. I know we'll have enough games to keep everyone entertained but will people be expecting us to do the first dance and will they be weirded out if we don't?

17 Comments

Latest activity by Anna, on June 3, 2020 at 10:58 PM
  • Jana
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
    • Flag
    Some people will expect everything because "it's how it's done at a wedding" regardless of the venue or time of day. If you don't have a dj or band, most guests will figure out quickly that they're mainly going to mingle, and more people than you think are actually ok with it. Don't cave to fit someone else's expectations when it goes against your vision. They have the option of leaving early. Honestly, don't worry.
    • Reply
  • Jana
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
    • Flag
    But yes I have been to countless weddings that didn't even have a first dance and people were totally ok with it. It gives them the chance to mingle with others.
    • Reply
  • Mrs. S
    Super November 2019
    Mrs. S ·
    • Flag
    I’ve been to a few weddings with no dancing. People had lunch and cake and then left. It’s a different kind of vibe but definitely fine.
    • Reply
  • Rebelle Fleur
    Rockstar July 2021
    Rebelle Fleur ·
    • Flag
    I’ve never been to a wedding with no dancing. Dancing is very important in my culture and is a part of ALL social gatherings. But I like your idea to have games instead. Different is good. I like when people are true to themselves. It’s what you and your FH want. Your wedding is an expression of your love but also your personal style.
    • Reply
  • Neeva
    VIP September 2020
    Neeva ·
    • Flag

    I recently went to a brunch wedding with no dancing! There was a ceremony, cocktail hour and then a reception with dinner, speeches and drinks. After dinner was over, no dancing, just went home Smiley smile It worked out well and was nice

    • Reply
  • Tee
    Dedicated October 2021
    Tee ·
    • Flag
    I think it will be nice especially at the brunch hour! I’ve been to an evening wedding with no dancing and it was still beautiful.
    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Devoted March 2021
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    All I can say is, do you girl!!! If that's what you and FH want, then do it!! Y'all are paying for it!! And, y'all are inviting family and friends to enjoy your special day!! So make your special day whatever you want to make it!! I know it will be amazing no matter what you choose.. But you should definitely do you!! Congratulations and good luck with everything!!
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    I’ve been to several smallish (fewer than 50 guests) evening weddings that didn’t have dancing and they were all amazingly intimate and cool (more relaxed fun than party vibe). Dancing definitely isn’t expected at a brunch wedding. Lawn games would be perfect! Maybe a few food stations (crepe or omelette) and a fancy coffee bar.
    • Reply
  • Rebecca
    Rockstar August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    The brunch wedding we went to had karaoke, and people could dance if they chose. It wasn't a dancing crowd, though I would have.

    People can expect whatever they want - but it's your wedding, and therefore should reflect what *you* want.

    • Reply
  • Christina
    Devoted July 2020
    Christina ·
    • Flag
    I think our door games sound like big fun ! Itis your day do what you want. I love the idea of a brunch wedding !! So creative !
    • Reply
  • Alexis
    Just Said Yes June 2020
    Alexis ·
    • Flag

    Thank you, everyone, for the advice! We officially opted out of dancing and we're going to play the shoe game to kickstart the rest of the reception. Super excited for it and deciding against dancing took a big weight off our shoulders. Thank you!!

    • Reply
  • Naikesha
    Super September 2020
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    Something to keep in mind: some people do not do any music, if they don't have dancing. I think that is a mistake. All of the nicest day or evening weddings I have been to have had some feel good music to listen to. whether tou make a playlist of oldies, or hire a few musicians or a group, people like to chit chat and walk aroung with sound that lifts their mood, and they will stay longer.
    • Reply
  • Anna
    VIP October 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag
    The majority of the weddings I’ve been to did not have any dancing. Baptist here and all the weddings I attended as a child were held completely at they church, reception too. And as an adult about half of them have had dancing and half have not.
    • Reply
  • Anna
    VIP October 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    See and I disagree with this. The majority of the weddings I’ve been to had their reception in the church fellowship hall. It was still a great atmosphere with lots of talking and fellowship. But it’s also different when a majority of the guests know each other. When they’re disjointed and aren’t comfortable with each other it’s harder to get that fellowship going and music would certainly help.
    • Reply
  • Jamie
    Savvy October 2021
    Jamie ·
    • Flag

    All weddings I have been to had music and dancing. But I am a lot like you, my fiance and I do not want to dance in front of people. I remember one wedding I had been to and they also had out door lawn games (horse shoes, corn hole, etc) and that was my jam. I can only imagine my close knit family and close friends playing games and talking around a fire making smore's. Sounds perfect!

    • Reply
  • Anna
    VIP October 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Ooh, making s’mores sounds nice. I wish my venue had a fire pit, even a small one. I am hoping to have lawn games: giant tic tac toe, giant jenga, cornhole and maybe croquet. I’m still going to have dancing because my FH and I have talked about our first dance for months and I really want my daddy-daughter dance (especially now that I’ve found the perfect song for us too). Also my mom is looking forward to getting my dad to dance with her once (I’ve also picked out the perfect song for the anniversary dance). My parents had a very private wedding with their reception at my grandparents house. Dancing at weddings was not a thing they did then and I doubt my dad would’ve done it then.
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