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Super September 2021

Brother trouble.

Stephanie, on August 14, 2019 at 1:32 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 6

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Many years ago I lost one of my brothers, to health reasons. So never since then I have always wanted my other brother to be apart of my wedding, but when my FH and I set a date, my brother didn't want to be apart of our wedding party, which was fine as long as her was there. Thats all I wanted. So we picked our people, and had things set in motion. A few days ago my brother and his girlfriend were over, and She brought up how my brother was upset i didn't want him to be in my wedding. I was kinda upset but I said to him that if he wanted to be in the wedding it wasn't to late and I just had to make sure I could still get the bridesmaid's dresses that already have been ordered. He seemed happy. So I started making phone calls, playing tag with the dress shop and dress makers. Finally, I got answers that I could get another dress but it needed order soon within the next month to be made in time and also because they are discontinuing that style. Well i called my brother, i told him i needed an answer either way. He tells me yes, they want to do it! I was very happy! but now its a big run around. One minute its yes, the next its a no. I mean i understand its very last minute rush around, but If he would of told me this months ago it wouldn't have been. I'm very upset but also disappointed. I dont know what to do? Any advice for this situation would be great. Also please dont tell me i have time, and that its to soon to get dresses. I have different circumstances than other brides!

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Stephanie, on August 15, 2019 at 4:50 PM

VIP March 2019
Yoice · on August 14, 2019 at 1:45 PM
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I think you need to have a sit down with him and explain to him. Honestly is your best friend at all times and he might understand it if you just tell him you want him there but need a secure decision. If it doesn’t help I say you go with the flow and plan to have him or not have him. You can now have more bridesmaids then groomsman so no big deal.
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Super July 2018
Brittany · on August 14, 2019 at 2:23 PM
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The best thing to do is find out what's making him say no and address it. Is it the fact that he doesn't know the other groomsmen? Does he get nervous standing up in front of people? Does he not want to wear or buy the attire? My mom and I both had to give my brother a little encouragement and reassurance about being a groomsmen because he did feel a little uncomfortable for a few reasons, but he ended up enjoying it and feeling totally fine.
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Super September 2021
Stephanie · on August 14, 2019 at 4:08 PM
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I have tried my best to explain to him but he either doesnt want to hear me or he just doesnt answer me. I'm starting to think maybe he didnt want to do it in the first place, but only said something because his girlfriend wanted to know why he wasnt in the wedding. im not sure at this point.
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Super September 2021
Stephanie · on August 14, 2019 at 4:13 PM
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I have tried to figure out what is making him say no, but i havent had any luck. Its not the fact that he doesnt know the other groomsmen, because they are either family or friends that my whole family has known for years, He isnt nervous standing up in front of people either, me on the other hand but thats a different story. My attire for our wedding is very simple and not pricey at all. Its jeans and boots, which he wears on daily, and a white shirt which he has, and a vest that is only 44 bucks, We are paying for everything else he might need. I guess i will just have to try to talk to him again. If i dont get an answer I will just go with the flow and just hope he at least comes.
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Expert May 2016
needmorewine · on August 14, 2019 at 7:12 PM
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If he's wearing jeans and boots, then what does getting another bridesmaid dress have to do with your brother being in the wedding? It's a little confusing that you make it sound like you agreeing to have him in the wedding was contingent on getting a bridesmaid dress that has nothing to do with him.
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Super September 2021
Stephanie · on August 15, 2019 at 4:50 PM
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He will only been in the wedding if he can walk with his girlfriend, who isnt in the wedding, So i would need to order another bridesmaid dress for her to be in the wedding, which he and she both knew. So thats what i need an answer on. Thats why its sucha a big rush because i need an answer to get the dress for her, if she isnt in the wedding then he wont be either. but im not getting an answer from either of them.
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