Bridesmaids

No, thank god both of my MOH's and all of my bridesmaids have been pretty responsive throughout this whole process and they ordered their dresses when I asked them to. I have seen other brides on here complaining about their bridesmaids though.

Your wedding is a year away, what exactly are they “supposed to” be doing?

I only have 3 (1 MOH & 2 bridesmaids) & they all have been very responsive. We didn’t start actively looking for their dresses until November for my April wedding. 2 of the 3 went with me to look for my dress this past June. My MOH (my sister) keeps me focused when I start overthinking things. I don’t expect them to help decorate as that’s included in the package we opted for at our venue.
What exactly are you wanting from them a as t this point?

I'm not sure what you think they should be doing, but bridesmaids are only required to buy their attire and stand beside you on your wedding day. Other things like a bridal shower or bachelorette party are optional so if they offer to throw either that's great, but if they don't that's okay too. It also it's their job to help plan your wedding. That's up to you and your fiance.

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Its just the communicating ...and i'm really wanting them to go get take a look at some dresses so i can see what they look like in them

I created a group message for my girls and I so everything is in one place! So far I haven't had any problems with communication. For dresses, I just sent pictures of ones that I liked and asked for their opinions. Our wedding isn't until January 2022, but I'm also full steam ahead when it comes to planning, so I wanted to have a dress narrowed down! Since it's an online store, I don't expect them to buy their dresses now, but I did notify them about the Black Friday sale going on and that if they wanted to purchase their dress now they could.

Since your wedding isn't until next year, I wouldn't expect them to start looking for and trying on dresses just yet! If you really want to see them in dresses ASAP, you all could always have a fun girls weekend and go together? That way you all get to spend some time together, but you also get to see them in dresses.

With your wedding this far out, I wouldn’t worry about bridesmaids finding their dresses. BM dresses typically aren’t ordered until 4-6 mos prior to the wedding, since they do not take nearly as long to receive and typically don’t require the kind of alterations wedding dresses do. Add to that the fact that we are in the middle of a pandemic with cases soaring higher than ever- Probably not the best time to have people going into businesses now anyway. Shoot for March or April to find BM dresses.

My Matron of Honor is the opposite. And she knows how stressed I am about everything. So she has taken over the responsibility for the bridal party. I never asked. I talked about setting up a zoom meeting with the girls. And she told me not to worry about that, that she would handle it. But I do have two very non-responsive bridesmaids. But they showed up for my wedding dress appointment that's all I really need. But I also take into consideration one of my bridesmaid is a mom of three with a newborn, another one is 8.5 months pregnant, and my maid of honor works full time and is in grad school across the country. It's hard to keep track of everything. It's frustrating I totally get that. But it's hard when everyone has so much going on in their life. Things are crazy right now, don't worry too much.

Yep. Have to be firm with them. Listen to them with an open mind, but do what's best for you. It helps if you go ahead with making decisions in a graceful way like with their dresses or b something. I learned Nobody cares about your wedding day as much as you do and your vendors. So be your own hype girl and have fun planning !

Absolutely aha.

but that also made me learn the hard way that people just aren't always as interested in your wedding as you are and that they have their own stuff going on.

Bridesmaids and MOHs have no duties other than being there to support you on the day (and generally wearing what you ask them to). Anything beyond that is voluntary.

In saying this, be mindful, especially far out from the day, that no one (including your bridal party) will ever be as excited for your wedding as you, so they may not be as responsive (at least in the early days) as you expect them to because it is just not as much of a priority to them as it is to you.

View Quoted Comment Breath girl. You have plenty of time. What colors are you using? My colors are red, charcoal and cream. My wedding is in April & I didn’t want the pastels that would be out at that time. I waited til Xmas season so the red I wanted would be out.

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My colors are wine, navy with a splash of blush

Nope. All of my bridal party showed up to my wedding weekend on time with their correct outfits. That was their only duty.

View Quoted Comment What colors do you want them to wear?

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Their wearing the wine color and groommens are wearing navy...what about u

View Quoted Comment Mine are wearing red. I’ve let them choose their own style as long as the dress is long. One of my bridesmaids has had a double mastectomy so I’m not about to decide on a style for her. We went shopping 2 weeks ago & they all got their dresses. Bought some long stem fake flowers at Hobby Lobby that’ll tie in the rest of the colors.
My fiancé still hasn’t decided on his groomsmen or what they’re wearing. He knows he wants to wear a suit & not a tux. We have an appointment this Sunday for him to get fitted. I’m thing a charcoal with a dark tie.

This is my worst fear. I haven't chosen my bridesmaids yet (only my MOH so far due to some family issues). A couple people I'm considering aren't very reliable but they're family, so it's difficult. Even though you have plenty of time, it's your day and you want things to go right and the way you want them to, so don't feel bad about being nervous about this. I think it's always a good idea to approach everyone in your wedding party and let them know what your expectations are. It's just like any good relationship - they need to know what you need from them.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for understanding. .I though I was crazy

View Quoted Comment Definitely not crazy. It's not unreasonable to expect people to respond to messages or requests