Bridesmaids Proposal

Your FH is right, you should probably wait. You could still ask for their opinions on things as your friends! And, just remember, a bridesmaid’s only official duty is buying the dress and standing by your side!

Of course you are excited...you are getting MARRIED!!! Congrats on that, BUT I agree with your FH. The longer you wait, the better, because you never know what might change between now and then and you don't want to end up having bridesmaid regret. Plus, not to be a "Debbie Downer" but let me warn you that bridesmaids aren't typically involved in a lot of the planning (not saying that isn't true for some lucky brides), but I don't want your expectations to get crushed in case they don't act as involved / excited as you hoped they'd be. Good luck with everything

View Quoted Comment Thanks Brittany! It’s so hard not to start doing stuff already!

View Quoted Comment Thanks Danielle. I suppose you’re right lol

I would wait til about 8 months out. Things change. Also those decisions you listed should be made with your FI, not your bridal party.

View Quoted Comment I guess I didn’t mean decisions, more like advice because they’ve done this before and I values their opinions.

I asked at 18 months and I had an issue not because of the timing. But because a girl who I’m no longer close with was mad she was “just a bridesmaid” instead of maid of honor. We were besties growing up but we’re almost 30 now and she lives in Europe. She wouldn’t let me come visit her and we don’t keep in touch much. This would have blown up either way. I’m actually glad it happened way before the wedding so I could deal with it instead of having a nervous breakdown closer to the wedding. I think if you know who you want go for it.

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Totally get it! You can definitely ask these people their opinions whenever you're planning if you want to - the person I talked to about this stuff the most was not one of my BM's. I would still wait a bit to ask them officially though. There are ppl on here all the time who asked their party super early and then regretted a decision or had a relationship change and wouldn't have asked this person now. Good luck planning!

I don't think I waited aha. I think immediately after I got engaged I was like YALL MY BRIDESMAIDS aha

You do what YOU want. I asked my girls in January and my wedding isn’t until this coming April. And everyone was excited because they knew we were engaged and was excited to know if they were in the party or not

Ask now. That way, god forbid, if one cannot do it you have plenty of time to look for a replacement. Also, some gowns take longer to get in.
I did Proposal Boxes that I have handlainted and filled to fit each girl, while having some similar items. I’ll post pix later.

I agree- wait until you're closer to 9-12 months out to ask them.

I asked my girls a month after getting engaged, which at the time was about 1 year 10 months away from the wedding (now I'm at 10 months out). I was 100%certain who I wanted and I have no regrets. Sure it's possible that things change, it's not unheard of. But if you're sure I say go for it, its your wedding and you know your friendships best!

I asked my girls within a month or so of getting engaged! I asked in December 18 and I'll be getting married July 20. I was so excited and they have been so helpful in the planning process this far! Do what makes you comfortable! My FH asked his guys around Jan 19 mainly cause I had already asked mine

You typically make those kind of decisions without bridesmaids. You and your fiance (and maybe any parents that are contributing financially) plan the wedding. Bridesmaids are just VIPs and they typically are involved in planning the bachelorette and shower.

As far as asking your bridal party goes, I'd hold off a little longer. You don't need to wait until Dec/Jan because I know how hard it is to wait that long, but just put some extra thought into this decision for another 2-3 months. Really think about how reliable these friends are and if you are sure you see them in your future. The "how girls are" comment your fiance made probably has to do with him not wanting you to ask friends that you can't count on. I thought about asking certain friends to be bridesmaids and my husband (fiance at the time) was like "why? they always disappoint you and never follow through when you try to make plans with them" So I didn't ask them and I'm so glad I didn't. I asked my bridesmaids 13-14 months before the wedding but I thought hard for 2-3 months before asking anyone. I'm glad I did because I ended up with a great bridal party. Also, don't let anyone make you afraid to ask the friends of 10 months because people you are currently close with make the best bridesmaids. I asked a friend of under a year too and our friendship remained really strong.

View Quoted Comment I already made my proposal boxes 😂 it’s just when to give... lol

Yes I agree I would say wait. Things could change fir any reason and don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Happy planning 🖤👰🏻

I asked my girls exactly one year in advance. And my MOH about 2 weeks earlier than that.
Honestly, give it a little time.
I know it's super exciting, but waiting could mean a little less stress down the road.