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Savvy June 2022

Bridesmaids past and present. What was the most over the top request you got from a bride, and did you agree to it?

Rebecca, on March 2, 2021 at 10:05 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 14

So I've had honestly good experiences being in bridal parties as a bridesmaid, and I haven't had to do anything to ridiculous. But after spending too much of this morning down an internet rabbit hole of bridezilla stories. I'm wondering what was the worst, over the top request you got, and whether you agreed to it.

14 Comments

Latest activity by Kayla, on March 3, 2021 at 9:52 AM
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    For the weddings that I've been a bridesmaid in, I can honestly say that I never got any crazy or ridiculous requests! I bought the required dress, attended the bridal shower and bachelorette parties, and had the option to get hair and makeup professionally done for the wedding. The brides were never over-the-top or unreasonable.
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  • Expert September 2021
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    LOL I've been at my desk looking at reddit all morning, too!

    I haven't had any bad experiences as a bridesmaid - but I have one from one of my bridesmaids!

    She has tattoos and recently asked "how I wanted to her to handle them" for the wedding. I was super confused, and then she told me she recently had to buy $60 matte foundation to cover her tattoos for another friend's wedding she was in. And once it started wearing off, she was asked to put on a jacket. I thought it was incredibly rude to ask this of your bridesmaid!

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  • H
    Beginner July 2022
    Hannah ·
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    I was a bridesmaid in a wedding, where the bride had this idea of making us bridesmaids who were from about 5'1 to 5'10 the same height in the photos using heels. She wanted the tallest bridesmaid to wear flats, while she wanted the poor 5'1 bridesmaid to wear 9 inch heels (do they even exist?). Me being 5'6, I would have had to have to wear 4 inch heels, which is okay with me.

    It was a ridiculous request, and it took us a full weekend to convince the bride otherwise. Funnily enough that was her only real bridezilla moment. She was actually really chill apart from that.

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  • Stephanie
    Savvy September 2022
    Stephanie ·
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    I dyed my naturally brunette hair blonde because the bride wanted the bridesmaids hair to match, and she wanted a contrast between her raven black hair and us bridesmaids with our blonde. The logic was that if everything else matched with us bridesmaids, why not match hair colors. And it wasn't just me, she had the non-blonde bridesmaids agree as well.

    Very over the top, but she payed for us to have it dyed properly in the salon, and honestly the photos looked great. I don't regret dyeing my hair. Also said bride is a bridesmaid in my wedding, and I get to pick out her hair color for my wedding Smiley xd

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I don’t think I’ve had any weird or unreasonable requests either!
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  • S
    Expert November 2021
    Sara ·
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    I wasn't a bridesmaid in the wedding, but I knew someone from college who tried to ban her bridesmaids from wearing heels because she was short and wanted to appear taller. This did NOT go over well. The bridesmaids had classy long black dresses, and having to alter them to accommodate flats would have prevented them from ever wearing the dresses again. And the dresses were around $200 each, so not cheap! Eventually the bride came to her senses though and rescinded her ban on heels.

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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
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    I have only been a bridesmaid/MOH twice and both times all I had to do was buy and wear expensive, unflattering dresses and ugly, dyed shoes (hey, it was the 90s! Smiley winking ). Thankfully, destination bachelorette parties and over the top bridal showers in expensive venues weren't a thing then (at least not in my circles).

    I was much younger then, so I don't know if I would have had the fortitude to stand up to a bridezilla, so I am glad that my friend and sister didn't demand I get a fake tan or dye my hair or whathaveyou.

    I can't imagine I will ever be asked to be in a wedding again, but if I were, I definitely wouldn't submit gracefully to unreasonable requests.

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  • L
    Lady ·
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    I have declined destination bachelorette parties and one bride wanted the BM's to choreograph a dance to perform for her spouse. We all said no to that one.

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  • KYLIE
    Super May 2019
    KYLIE ·
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    Nothing too outrageous! I did have one friend who between hair and makeup services, a very expensive dress, lavish bachelorette and more asked us to spend what I considered a lot of money. I was a little salty at that, especially because I tried to keep costs super reasonable for my girls, of which she was one.

    Also, I attended a bachelorette where I had to pay $250 a night to sleep on a full-sized air mattress with two other girls on the floor of an old house without AC in the middle of summer in New England. Not pleasant!

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  • SLY
    Master January 2022
    SLY ·
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    The only request that kinda rubbed me the wrong way was when the planner (Aunt of the bride), had the bridal party help set up everything for the wedding. They DIYd it all so we and the groomsmen had to literally set up a tent, tables, chairs, tablecloths, centerpieces, everythingggg. Not to mention this was in the middle of summer in Georgia so it was HOT. My makeup looked awful at the end of it, and my curled hair (which is fine and doesn't hold curls well) was stick straight by the end of the ceremony. Her aunt made sure to tell me that it was my fault my curls didn't hold lmao.

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  • Allie
    VIP November 2021
    Allie ·
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    This isn't exactly CRAZY...but if you were there, you'd understand!

    My best friend was with me selecting bridesmaids dresses. It was just the two of us because I couldn't attend her big appointment due to work, so she and I went ahead of time to pick some out. Her wedding was outside in late October, which is fairly chilly in New England, and it was on a mountain. She INSISTED on having short dresses. I get it, some people like that more...but I tried so very hard to convince her otherwise. She picked out these mini dress style dresses that I don't really think anyone was comfortable in because it had a slit up the back and she had girls of all sizes in her party. The girls asked her if they could wear tights to keep their legs warm, and she said no because she didn't like the look of tights. They asked if we could wear a shawl and she said no. So basically, we were standing up there in 60 degree weather half naked. One of her other bridesmaids and I did a few shots before the ceremony so we could keep warm via alcohol, and it worked. The other bridesmaids were shivering the entire time. Now that she looks back on it, she apologizes ALL the time and says she has no idea what she was thinking! We laugh about it now, but it was tough that day because we were all very cold.

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  • Scandalousrandallous
    Devoted July 2023
    Scandalousrandallous ·
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    (all different weddings, not in any order): Iʻve dyed my hair purple. Stayed the night in a house with people I didnʻt know to work all night on the reception decor. Got up at 4AM to build bouquets. Ran around to 5 different hardware stores looking for a specific battery for tea lights the bride wanted in vases. Planned the entire wedding in 4 days cuz the bride thought the caterer, the dress, and the officiant was all she needed. Slept on couches, in tents, on floors, etc. Foot the bill for a spa day cuz the bridesmaids didnʻt know they chip in for the bride. Planned a $600 Harry Potter bridal shower. Gosh Iʻll have to think of more, but I forgot most of these haha

    When I said I am done with weddings, I am so glad all my besties are now married!!

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  • M
    Expert April 2021
    Melody ·
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    I have to say, I kind of enjoy reading all those stories of bridezillas - it's like watching a train wreck! It's horrible, but you just can't take your eyes off it.... I'm just really hoping I don't have a monster moment!

    As a bridesmaid I really haven't been asked to do anything crazy. I did feel a bit put out for my cousin's wedding, though. I was asked to be a bridesmaid as an afterthought and was never consulted about what I might be able to afford. I was 20 at the time and had just moved to a very HCoL area where I was working 2 jobs (8-16 hours per day every day of the week) just to be able to barely afford rent and food and gas. I had literally no extra money, which she knew, and no offer to help with purchases was made. (I know it's not required, but given the situation and that I'm family it definitely would have been nice. Maybe I should have declined? Well, hindsight is 20/20.) I had to drive to a city 3hrs away to buy my dress (cost of dress that I couldn't afford plus extra gas I REALLY couldn't afford) and was told I needed to chip in for the bachelorette party party (spa day for cousin only, then out to dinner at an expensive restaurant) even if I didn't attend the dinner portion. Thank God my sister was MoH and was able to spot me for those things until I was able to fully pay her back over the course of about 8 months...

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  • K
    Beginner September 2021
    Kayla ·
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    I'm pale and blonde, so my brother's wife had me get a spray tan to match the coloration of the bridesmaids, and to avoid me sticking out. She also asked me to dye my hair black, because I was the only blonde bridesmaid and she didn't want me sticking out. She would also have every bridesmaid weigh themselves every two weeks, and tell us off, if we gained a few pounds.

    I was only 17, and I thought that it was okay for brides to have that much of a say in their appearance, so I didn't really complain and I did as she said.

    No way would I agree to that now.

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