Just Said Yes December 2020

Bridesmaids group chat

Brittany, on January 14, 2020 at 8:49 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 14
So we just put the deposit down for our venue for December 5th of this year (2020). Would it be too early to send a group chat to my girls and let them know info and start planning and discussing things? I have already done proposals to all except my JR but she won't be in this chat. It will just be my "bigs" as I've been calling them lol. I have been so excited to text them all but I don't wanna do it too early. I stopped telling people our date and where we wanted it because it seemed like everybody around us had an opinion about what WE wanted so some of our party don't even know the exact date, they just know it's in the Fall of this year.


Latest activity by Alejandra, on January 15, 2020 at 8:58 PM
  • Becca
    Devoted October 2019
    Becca ·
    • Flag
    I started my group chat very early with bridesmaids. But I’m the type of person who wants to get it all out on the table. I also thought it was a fun way for the ladies to meet each other since they didn’t know each other at all and all lived in different states. I say if you are ready to discuss items with your ladies then start your chat.

    Congrats. And good luck with the rest of your wedding plans.
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Master September 2020
    Nicole ·
    • Flag

    I personally think it's too early. I just texted my girls in a group text this past week (at just under 6 months out) to give them information about dresses. I'll probably use it in June when I need final numbers for makeup and then to give information about rehearsal, etc. I can't imagine there's much to talk about with them right now, anyway. For reference, I asked my girls last summer (and my sister in December 2018 while she was in town since she lives out of state). This was the first conversation about the wedding with them since then.

    • Reply
  • Devoted June 2020
    • Flag
    I made our group chat almost right away. I asked them to stand up with me and then I made the chat. Everyone introduced themselves right away and it’s been going well. It’s been really helpful, at least for me.
    We got engaged in February 2019 and our wedding is June 2020.
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    I don’t think there’s much you need to send in a group message until it’s time to go dress shopping. And even that I would just communicate individually.
    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Champion October 2018
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    As someone who has been a bridesmaid a lot I hate group texts. There’s really nothing to discuss as a group. I would text or email them individually about dress information when it’s time.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I made mine almost right away too. I'm in one now at the moment as well.
    • Reply
  • J
    Expert May 2021
    Jaime ·
    • Flag

    I started a bridesmaid chat when I wanted to make a bridal dress appt and wondered if people wanted to join in. I had privately checked in with each one about their interest in going. They all wanted to go and I was able to glean a date from these private conversations, so I just started the chat for logistics on the day so I didn't have to send out private messages to 5 people. It's not super active, but we are now thinking about bridesmaid dresses so there was a discussion to set up an appt at a salon and my MOH ordered a few dresses from Azazie to try on so she invited people for that. I'm not including these ladies in on wedding planning or other decision making so I just see this chat as a way to quickly make a plan to do things they are involved in, like buying dresses. It seems to be going well so far.

    • Reply
  • Aja
    Dedicated January 2020
    Aja ·
    • Flag

    I made one pretty early on to start discussing details with them like the date and location so they could start hashing out any necessary travel. After that I used it for dress shopping, bridesmaid dress opinions, and so on. Plus it was a great way for them to meet and chat a little bit beforehand. They've been tipping each other off with deals on dress hemming, shoes, hotels, etc. so it's worked out wonderfully.

    • Reply
  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
    • Flag

    While I personally think it is way too early, I do agree that if your "bigs" don't already know each other, it might be a good way to let everyone start getting more acquainted. I would however not start any wedding talk for a while. Also keep in mind that their only requirement is to get their dresses and show up on the day of. Any bach party, showers etc are up to them to plan. I see so many post about brides getting mad at the BM's or MOH for not doing this or that for her and it is sad that so many friendships are ruined over high expectations vs reality. You are under a year away! Such an exciting time. Enjoy it!

    • Reply
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    I think starting a group chat and sending one big message with all the information you have is fine. As a bridesmaid, I couldn't keep track of or pay attention if the bride was sending new information everyday or keeping group text messages going for hours at a time.

    • Reply
  • K
    Dedicated October 2019
    KAREN ·
    • Flag

    Never too early! I started one a week after we got engaged.

    It's good for them to get to know each other (if they don't) and to have the information to plan out what kind of money they need, travel, etc.

    • Reply
  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    All of this. Also, does anyone actually like group texts?

    • Reply
  • Deirdre
    Super March 2018
    Deirdre ·
    • Flag

    I think it's fine to start a group text to share the date (some people make plans super early, especially when it gets close to the holidays). Something like: We booked our venue!!! Save the date for... at ...

    Then you can gauge their reaction. I don't know your friends and some people are super into wedding planning (even when it's not theirs) and some people aren't). If they ask questions about colors and dresses, feel free to keep the conversation going. If they just say congratulations or good news, I would just reply with a thank you and wait until closer to the date to start texting the details. They all have things going on in their lives, so you don't want to burn them out by texting so much in the beginning before you really need to make any of these decisions. Good luck!

    • Reply
  • Alejandra
    Super November 2021
    Alejandra ·
    • Flag
    I don’t think you! You know your crowd better than we do. I started a group chat last month for our November 2020 wedding. They likely won’t all meet until August so I took that as the chance to introduce them to each other.
    • Reply

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