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Just Said Yes November 2020

Bridesmaids did not attend wedding shower or send a gift.

Sara, on September 10, 2020 at 9:42 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 16
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So two of my bridesmaids didn't attend my bridal shower (both for legitimate reasons) but neither sent a gift. Should I still send them thank you cards stating we're sorry to have missed them, hope to see them soon etc. or do I not send something since they didn't attend or send a gift. I've yet to be able to find any advice on the subject

16 Comments

Latest activity by Judith, on September 12, 2020 at 9:00 PM
  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    If they didn’t attend, nor send a gift, you do not need to send a thank you card.
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  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
    • Flag

    Yeah I would not send a thank you card. I mean they cannot get offended. You only send those when people attend an event or give a gift. Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    I agree with the previous comments, I don't think a thank you note is necessary. If the topic comes up over text or phone call, you can tell them at that time that you missed them at the event and hope to see them soon.
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Thank you cards are for gifts. You don't have anything to thank them for.

    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
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    No thank you cards if they didn't purchase you anything

    • Reply
  • C
    Just Said Yes April 2022
    Caitlin ·
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    Did they chip in anything to host the shower? If yes, send a note. If no, don’t send one - nothing to thank them for.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    This. I understand thanking them if they helped with the planning and paid for a portion despite being unable to attend, but if not, then you're good!
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I don’t think you need to send a thank you note
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Master October 2019
    Meghan ·
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    Send nothing. There is nothing to thank them for.

    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Master September 2020
    Nicole ·
    • Flag

    Definitely don't send a thank you card if they didn't give a gift or contribute. It would come off as very passive aggressive to do so.

    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Dedicated October 2020
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    There is nothing to thank them for so they shouldn’t get a thank you card.
    • Reply
  • Samantha
    Devoted September 2020
    Samantha ·
    • Flag

    I would not send one, maybe they plan to give you a gift at a later date so I would save a couple thank yous for later.

    • Reply
  • Samantha
    VIP October 2020
    Samantha ·
    • Flag

    If they helped pay for the party, then a thank you note would be a nice gesture. Otherwise, it's totally unnecessary.

    • Reply
  • L
    Expert September 2020
    ·
    • Flag
    No you dont need to send a thank you card, nor should they be expecting one. They didnt do anything lol
    • Reply
  • Vicky
    VIP January 2020
    Vicky ·
    • Flag

    Thank you cards are for presents. If they did not give you a present, you don't need to write them a card.

    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    If they contributed to the cost or work of prepping for a shower, but could not attend, they are due a thank you gift for that. Otherwise, no gift, no thank you. You do not send thank you notes for coming, only gifts. At wedding gift time, early gifts, you send a thank you note as soon as possible. They will not get a thank you for coming to the wedding, only for gifts, or services.
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