Bridesmaids Declined Proposal :(

Omg, thats terrible. I dont have a lot of girlfriends, so it was hard to decide who to even call at first, but luckily its a small wedding so i dont want a whole lot of bridemaids to begin with (probably 3). Have you tried offering to pay for the bridesmaid dresses, or talking to people more in depth about it like hay, it feels kind of bad people dont want to be in my wedding. If you dont want to be a bm i understand, but could you help me look sorta thing

View Quoted Comment I think eventually I will let them know how I feel, but not now. I don't want any pity bridesmaids. I want people who want to be there for me.

View Quoted Comment Oh, i know the feeling. Im just saying the expenses may be the only concern, or they might think its more of a responsibility than it really is. Like, they might be picturing having to throw a bachelorette party even though you might not want that sort of thing. Its worth talking about even if you leave out the way it makes you feel.

Don’t be discouraged by those who have declined . Have you reached out to your close friends or sister if you have any ?

I'm so sorry. That really has to hurt. My 4 accepted, but 3 have kind of acted like it's not something they care about. Their dresses should have been ordered by now but only one did. One said she just doesn't see the point in buying a dress she will only wear once (but was offended when I gave her the option of just coming as a guest), the other keeps having reasons why she has to push it back but then blows money on dumb things while I'm with her. Since these dresses take months to come in I might only have 1 girl up there. They kept telling me they were throwing a bachelorette party and getting me excited, then just stopped planning according to one of my girls. 1 friend said they'd throw me a bridal party several times and then didn't. 🤷‍♀️ I've started just trying to not get excited for things, which is a crappy way to feel about wedding festivities. There has been a lot of disappointment during this process, but I'm just trying to focus on the good of it.

View Quoted Comment I've made a list of some additional people I can ask.

View Quoted Comment I'm sorry that you've had such a hard time with your bridesmaids. I'm used to being very independent so it's very uncomfortable having to rely on other people for anything.

View Quoted Comment That’s a great start . Some of the denials could be because they are thinking to much into it . I’m sure your gonna find someone

View Quoted Comment Same! Which makes it so much more awkward. I hope you find a great bridal party!

I feel ya....i had a falling out btwn 2 of my closest friends over a year ago. We are starting to talk and I have invited them both to the wedding but have not asked them to be in it. Ive decided on 2 other friends who live out of town and my future SIL. To add insult to injury, my fiance has several people that he could have in his party and we have had to cut down drastically on his groomsmen as I can't match. This has been,a very difficulty issue for me and I have been bummed out about it. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone.

I'm very sorry as I know that has to really be hurtful because these are the ladies that you thought would stand by your side and they're not putting in the effort. Do you have any ladies in your bridal party? Your bridal party does not have to match your husband's. I will say this though maybe it is a good thing that they did decline because from some of the post I've seen on this site that there are bridesmaids who probably didn't really want to be a bridesmaid and then they are just causing problems for the bride in terms of getting their dresses or planning any events. I'm not sure if you still want to say something to them but maybe you really do consider your relationship with them because anytime I've asked to be a bridesmaid I've accepted even if I just met the person that I became friends with. I agreed because I really like that person and consider them a good friend that I'd be happy to stand by their side. don't let this bring you down as your wedding planning experience should still be a great one. Even if you only have one or two really good friends standing by your side. I wouldn't reach out to people that you're not close to because it could be awkward asking someone that you're not tight with to be in your bridal party. I would maybe ask close family members even if it's your mother or something.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I asked a friend to be a bridesmaid and we ended up having a falling out a few months ago. She blocked me on social media. I decided I didn't need her negativity anymore and blocked her cell number as well. She was causing me a lot of stress and was very disrespectful to my FH. So now I only have 2 girls on my side. My FH has 3. At this point I don't care I have accepted the way things are.

All our people accepted and then several dropped out. My husband only had two guests at our wedding. his mom and best man. He was acting cool but I’m still upset about it. It sucks when you think people are there for you and theyre not. But at least they told you now so you won’t have the drama leading up to the wedding which also sucks.

I'm sorry, I can only imagine how much that stings.
But remember the wedding party sides dont have to be even.

Are you close with these people who declined? I feel like even if someone is worried about the cost of being a bridesmaid there are so many ways to work around that. If someone is really a friend then they’d say yes no matter the circumstances.

Thank you all for the kind words and encouragement. I spoke with my FH about it and I've prayed about and feel much better about the situation. As several other PP said, at least I know now instead of 2 weeks before the wedding. I truly believe that what's for me will be for me so I'm not going to stress or worry myself about it. Enjoy your day ladies! 😊