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Just Said Yes September 2020

Bridesmaid Trouble

on July 15, 2019 at 10:02 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 1 6

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Hi all!

I need some advice on how to handle some bridesmaid drama. A couple months ago I asked my best friend from college to be a bridesmaid in my wedding, without getting a super enthusiastic response. I found out recently that she was upset because I "stole her wedding date," even though her and her boyfriend are not engaged yet. She has now decided to get married exactly a month before we do. I wouldn't be worried, except she has a strong tendency to pull attention to herself and make everything drama filled. I couldn't imagine my day without her in it but I'm worried that we are now going to clash on everything leading up to our respective weddings and I could lose a friend over it. I could use any advice on how to navigate this!

Thanks!

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Lady, on July 15, 2019 at 1:52 PM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on July 15, 2019 at 10:06 AM
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Don’t discuss wedding planning with her. There’s really no need to share any of the details. The less she knows, the better. If she’s not even engaged, I don’t see this being an issue. If she does get engaged and actually sets a date a month before yours, she’ll be too busy with her own planning to participate much in yours anyway.
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Just Said Yes September 2020
· on July 15, 2019 at 10:28 AM
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Caytlyn,
That's also kinda why I'm worried. She's the bridesmaid that lives the closest to me and originally was supposed to help me out the most.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on July 15, 2019 at 10:31 AM
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What do you need her help with? Wedding planning should really be between you and your future spouse.
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Just Said Yes September 2020
· on July 15, 2019 at 10:33 AM
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A lot of my wedding is DIY and he's not super crafty. It's not so much the wedding planning that I'd need help with, more like the small stuff that the bridemaids would normally help with.
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Super July 2018
Brittany · on July 15, 2019 at 11:39 AM
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Like Caytlyn mentioned, bridesmaids aren't wedding planners, they don't normally help with DIY and things for the wedding. They only handle that for the bridal shower and bachelorette if they volunteer to help host those.
The best way to not lose a friend is to make sure you keep treating her like a friend not just a bridesmaid. Don't make every time you hang out with her about the wedding, keep doing the things you used to do together and talking about the things you used to.
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Lady · on July 15, 2019 at 1:52 PM
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Bridesmaids dont' :normally" help you with your DIY projects. If they offer, it's totally fine to accept, but they certainly do not have to. If you're DIYing you really should do it YOURSELF. This really is a non-issue.
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