Bridesmaid Thank you gifts

Typically jewelry or other items intended to be worn during your wedding aren't considered a gift to your bridesmaids, they would be considered a prop for your photos. I agree that something personal to their tastes is the best idea. If your girls are coffee drinkers, you could go with a Starbucks (or their fav coffee shop) gift card, if they like to drink you could do a bottle of their favorite wine or alcohol and a glass or tumbler to go with it, if they need some TLC you could do a spa or mani/pedi gift card.

I’m buying my girls jewelry and also getting them tumblers from Etsy with their names on them for the day of the wedding. Figured everyone will use them for water/mimosas while we’re getting ready and I’m sure they will use them after the wedding too!!

I'm Buying Their Jewelry. It Is Their Gift From Me But Also To Wear For The Wedding. Itll Be A Cute Little Surprise While We're All Getting Ready.

Agree with Caytlyn— jewelry that you expect them to wear for the wedding is not considered a gift.


I bought my bridesmaids jewelry (all different pieces based on their individual style), but made sure they knew I didn’t expect them to wear it for the wedding. I believe all of them did end up wearing it though.
Shop for each one like it’s their birthday. They don’t all need to receive the same gift.

Shop like it is their birthday or a holiday gift. For each person, their individual hobby, or style, or favorite type of music. Nothing worn for the wedding is a thank you gift. That sort of thing is chosen to match or go with bride's taste. A prop for your wedding. A thank you should be individual to the person you are thanking. In real life these folks are not any kind of a team, the friendships are individual. Gifts should reflect that.

I bought each of my girls a watercolor cartoon based off of my favorite photo of each of us.

Best thing I got was that we went and made our own perfume then tasted wine and then was gifted our favorite as a surprise at the morning of the wedding with a personal note(made us all cry) and small personal gift(leather bound journal for friend who writes, crystal rock string lights for our tranquil friend, and I got these really nice arrows for my archery) which ofcourse made us cry happily that she thought of us.

I got them some stuff i felt would be useful beyond the wedding like a compact mirror or a tote bag

People recommend shop for their gifts as if you are shopping for the birthdays. I was in a wedding, I got earrings and a robe. I haven’t touched it since the wedding. I didn’t like the design of the earrings. The bride just had us all wear the same one.

View Quoted Comment As someone who has been in a lot of weddings, this is the general complaint. No one wants to seem ungrateful, and no one wants to upset the bride. So 2-6 people all gush thanks, and maybe 1 or 2 mean it, usually those never in a wedding before. Robes, never worn, make for nice scrap cloth for kids to make doll clothes, in my house. And any group jewelry, shirts, tees, totes, candles, anything scented, anything with any name or monogram ( mine or bride's), any general item of clothing , anything bridesmaid or bride tribe, any stuff from spas, or cosmetics spas,, are instant trash, or Goodwill. Even goodwill won't take anything personalized. Most people who have lived on their own a few years don't keep cabinets of unmatched wine glasses and tumblers and mugs with things written on them. I and 2 other who do not drink wine ( ever) that a hostess knows when we visit, and 2 who don't drink for religious reasons, were 5 of 6 who received gift boxes of 3 bottles each of expensive wine last season, one wedding I was in. With the, oh well, everyone loves wine... rather rude for a bride and groom to do the easy think, all in WP get the same gift. Actually, seemed thoughtless and rude. Many brides do give very thoughtful, personal, individual gifts. But group gifts, and stuff never used after the wedding, or even at it, is often worse than no gift at all. Because it sends the message, let's make life easy, gift shop and bargain bin stuff. Or, worse, very expensive stuff. A bride commissioned bracelets and necklaces , hundreds a set,, from a name jeweler. Everyone hated them, only sister of the bride would even put hers on. Colors to match dresses no one liked ( bought to please the bride), totally trash because they matched no person's usual taste or style. $1500 altogether. Wasted. I would prefer a used paperback or CD of something I like, than a $125 non transferable spa gift certificate I throw away. I have never figured why people one has known for 5-20 years, who year after year give something inexpensive but appreciated, if they give a birthday, Christmas, or anniversary gift, do such a dismal job with novelties and generic gift shop stuff. My husband discards flsks, colored ties, shot glasses, kit bags, for the same reason. But hurray for the person who gave him a green felt for a card table top, another who gave gloves with batteries for heat, and a brother who gave him 12 matching clear glass beer or cold drink mugs for his home office. $25 well spent, since that is where the big screen TV is. I got a new leather wood carrier ( multiple stoves and fireplaces) a new kayak paddle and 8 lg. skeins of beautiful wool yarn , that I made his and hers sweaters from , in the last year. Nice. Thoughtful. Like a real gift of thanks should be. At two others, I got robes I never put on even for pictures, glass cups and scented candles useless with 5 kids and 7 dogs ( 4 are pups) , and 2 necklaces and bracelets I am allergic to. A waste.

Pick something within a budget you decide on that fits each woman personally. There is no need for them to be personalized with names or titles unless you choose. But pick something that she can use in her everyday life that fits her individual interests/hobbies. There is no law saying it has to be wedding-related and they'll appreciate it more if it isn't.

As a gift for my bridesmaids I paid for their makeup and hair, I also got them each a tote bag with their names on it, a light weight zip up sweater, and some general self care items (face masks, bath bombs, etc) and the jewelry for the day. I think this is a know your crowd thing, all of my girls love face masks and bath bombs, all of them have worn the jewelry multiple times since (one even wore it during her recent wedding). The big piece was obviously the hair/makeup, in our circle it’s standard that bridesmaids pay for it themselves, and it’s always optional. I made it optional (all opted in) and then covered the cost, and they all got to pick their own hair style.

I only have one bridesmaid - my stepdaughter to be . I have purchased her a cute robe with her initial on it from David's Bridal, and will also get her a pair of drop earrings. I don't see these as props. These are gifts specific to the wedding but that can be used again. For point of reference, she is 23 and just graduated from college.

For what it's worth, I've been in a number of weddings, and they typically gave earrings or some sort of jewelry to wear in the wedding. It's up to you. Personally I'd prefer the earrings, but that's just me.

I'm also paying to get her hair and makeup done.

I'm kind of surprised at some of the comments about the gifts. Honestly it never occurred to me that I should get a gift for being in someone's wedding. A cute robe is a cute robe, and easy to reuse, as are earrings. I don't know. I say choose what you want. I'm suspecting they'll be happy with whatever - I certainly was! NONE of my gifts cost anywhere near the amount I'm spending. I'm okay with that, and would be very hurt and surprised if my BM was disapproving. Choose what feels right to you. As you can see, you ask 10 people, you get 10 different opinions .

View Quoted Comment I think most people don’t consider MATCHING earrings/jewelry or getting ready outfits a “gift” is because, the thought behind it was to serve for aesthetic purposes for your wedding.


Your situation with your step-daughter is a little different since you only had one bridesmaid— with her earrings, did you pick out something you know she would love and reuse? Or did you choose based on what you wanted her to wear? I’m guessing it’s something you knew she would like and reuse.
If a bride has 5 bridesmaids, more than likely, she’s choosing jewelry that looks best with the dress or look she’s going for— not exactly what EACH of her bridesmaid would like and reuse. It’s very unlikely you’ll pick out matching jewelry that every single one of your bridesmaids would like. I had 5 girls in my party and two of the girls preferred rose gold, two others liked white gold, and one liked yellow gold. How would I buy them all the same earrings knowing at least one of them would never wear those again?
I don’t think anyone EXPECTS a gift, but considering the money bridesmaids invest into weddings and the events leading up to it (I purchased their dresses, paid for hair and makeup, did proposal boxes, etc and my girls still ended up spending at least $2500/each overall for my wedding), I think buying them a well thought-out gift— it doesn’t have to be expensive— is the least a bride could do. Like I really like the watercolor cartoon gift a PP mentioned.

View Quoted Comment I feel sorry that you feel this way about all of the gifts your “friends” spent good money on. Did you receive anything you liked?

View Quoted Comment If you read the post, I gave a hurray for many thoughtful gifts received, listing the recent ones. The puzzle to me is why so many people who usually give gifts that are thoughtful at birthdays and holidays, give group generic things at weddings. Sometimes expensive, but thoughtless. And don't seam to realize that something well thought out , for each person, is often better appreciated. Even if it cost much less. And a major part of that is many brides give a list of things for themselves, the things the bride wants for her wedding, not gifts at all.
It is not all complaints. But sad to have thrown out so much useless stuff , and had so many others in the same wedding parties complain to each other they feel the same way.

I ended up tailoring all my gifts to the taste of the individual.

I found matching necklaces for the two of my BMs who are married (to each other) and are Disgeeks... and then I got them individual things that were Harry Potter themed to round it out. (A notebook for one, and a card-holder for the other, in their house colors. Since they are different houses, the other one won't borrow!) For my bridesman, DH and I got him a very nice dagger/knife, as we are all stage combatants and play with shiny blades. (Also, said bridesman also choreographed our reception swordfight skit.) For my MOH, I went to Etsy and found some beautiful Star Wars art, and framed it, because she's a huge SW fan.

DH bought cufflinks/earrings/necklaces (depending on gender) for his BP, but they were all different and referenced his relationship with them. (Sword cufflinks for his swordmaster, a Wonder Woman necklace for his groomslady, etc.)

None of our gifts referenced the wedding in any way, we simply tried to find things very specific to the person. They were huge hits, so I can only recommend that route.

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To be fair, it is rather difficult to buy gifts for people. We are thinking about maybe a restaurant gift cards. Also, in my previous case, the bride did not know me very well. Although we were childhood friends, our relationship departed 10 years ago. The bride only asked me to be her BM bc she wanted her bff at every stage of her life. The robe she gave was not bad, but I def. did not even want to wear the earrings on her wedding day.

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I've received jewelry as a gift from both times I was a bridesmaid. I don't have a problem with the idea of jewelry as a gift.