Bridesmaid struggle

I would tell her that with everything going on right now you won't be needing her in the wedding anymore. I wish I could give you better advice. I had a best friend, we were so close in high school then after high school we just didn't really talk much manly because she was always putting me down. Then when I got engaged she put down my engagement ring. Then got upset because I chose my mom to be my matron of honor instead of her. So I just in so many words told her that she no longer had a place in my life. It's been a year since and it really has been the best decision I could ever make. She was always stressing me out and now I don't have that stress on my shoulders.

View Quoted Comment Thank you!!
It’s just the constant unnecessary lying to me. I can no longer take. ☹️

I’m so sorry this is happening to you! You’re gonna have to be honest with her. You have a couple of different options. 1-confront her with what you found out & tell her you can’t trust her; 2-tell her that you feel that your relationship with her seems to be very distant & since she has moved away, you really need somebody closer to help with the wedding plans.

View Quoted Comment You don't need that with your wedding. It's supposed to be such a wonderful time in your life. Don't let one person make it more stressful than it already is. Especially with everything going on right now.

Exactly how you said it like hey I feel uts best for you not to be in my wedding because....and explain why. Tell here truth

If you care about her feelings, I wouldn't tell her the truth. Some people are just compulsive liars, and if that's her, she won't care about how you feel and what she's lied about. I'd just say something along the lines of, since she's moved away it'd be harder for her to be apart of all the things and it's probably best she isn't a bridesmaid anymore. If she moved far away and you guys don't even talk anymore, she shouldn't be that thrown off by it.

Kicking someone out of your wedding is a friendship-ending move. If you want to end the friendship, I would just go ahead and end the friendship; her involvement in your wedding will end as a result.

Honestly if it did end the friendship she's probably way better off. If I was her I'd just cut my losses with that friendship and just end the friendship anyways because it doesn't seem like there really is much of a friendship there anymore. Remember one thing just because you guys used to be such good close friends back then doesn't mean she still deserves a spot in your life now. People change and life goes on. Not everyone you are friends with will be lifelong friends. I had to realize this and I am so happy I did because my life is so much better with out my best friend in it. As an adult she became a very horrible friend to me and I would always say how we were such good close friends back when we were in school whenever anyone would question me on why I was still her friend. But like I said one day I realized that I didn't owe her a lifelong spot in my life just because we used to be such good friends. And so I dropped her as a friend.

Try to be honest, but not deliberately hurtful. Write to her, an e mail or latter. You do not want an argument. Say that since she moved away, you have been doing some thinking. And realized, your friendship once seemed very vital and important. But now you have each gone on to other things, other people. And you think it is time to move on, not patch things up. Wish her well in her new place/ job. Say you are not sure what is happening with your wedding planning, with Covid. But you will not be including her in plans for the wedding. You hope she understands that you are moving in different directions, and your friendship has come to a natural end. No need to go into details.