So, here's what's going on. FH's sister is one of my bridesmaids. I'm not very close to her, but it was pretty much implied that since my brothers are groomsmen (he is actually friends with them) that she will be very upset if she wasn't included, and since she is family, I didn't have an issue with asking her to be a bridesmaid.
Well, here is the thing. Pretty much from the get go of any planning, she always needs to find a way to get attention on her, or she has a reason why it won't work for her, or she knows something that would be better. For example, I asked my girls to just get a gray style cocktail dress that was knee length. She complained that the only dresses that she could find that looked good on her were floor length. Finally her mom talked her into getting a long dress altered. However, when she got it, she made all the attention on her.
Right now the issue is the responsibility of chipping in on the shower and bachelorette party. Because my MOH is from 5 hours out of town, I decided to make it easier on her and only have her drive down here twice (once for the parties and once for the weddings). I also decided to make it easier on my girls by saying that I wanted to have the shower and the bachelorette party in an awesome hotel that used to be a retirement home (so all the rooms are like small apartments, which can fit a lot of people). This is how much it was going to cost the girls to pay for the room.....ready....this is a room for both the bridal shower and the bachelorette party.....$53
Ok, the hotel is local, so not all of the people that are going to the bach party are going to be staying, especially those who are not bridesmaids. But as a bridesmaid she has said that because she isn't planning on staying (she's the only one who is not) she doesn't think she should have to pay the $53.
The other girls are doing everything in their power to get her to understand that this isn't for her to stay, this is party of her duty. Now they are working on the food and decor for the parties and they have all agreed to split the cost evenly, except for her. She is MIA. No one has heard from her since that conversation about the $53. She has complained to her mom about how it's not fair that she is expected to pay that, her mom think's she is crazy.
Ok, sorry for the long rant type backstory. Question is, I can't necessarily ask her to no longer be a bridesmaid. I mean she is family, and I view asking someone to step down from such role as pretty much saying you want to cancel whatever relationship you have with that person. But to me, it seems as if she wants all the honor of being a bridesmaid without any of the responsibility. I'm really just at a loss of how to deal with this. I'm afraid that she is just going to basically "ghost" us until it's time for things to happen then show up as if she is just as responsible as everyone else.
