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Just Said Yes October 2021

Bridesmaid (future Sister in Law) Drop Out

Mackenzie, on October 4, 2021 at 1:13 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 10
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Hello all! I’m getting married October 16th, 2021, which is right around the corner. My future sister in law who was my bridesmaid (no longer) decided to drop a bomb on my family yesterday, October 03,2021 and move out on my brother without telling him ( backstory they just bought a house together in June 2021 and were planning to getting married February 2022). I bought her bridesmaid dress, paid for the hair and makeup contract total payment, bridesmaid thank you gift - Kate Spade purse travel makeup container/robe/matching pajamas - totaling $800. I would return these items or request my money back from the vender, but either I can’t return it since I bought these items months in advance or I’m now within the contract limit I cannot simply remove her. Is it petty to request money from her?

10 Comments

Latest activity by Vicky, on October 7, 2021 at 9:21 PM
  • J
    Super March 2022
    JA ·
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    You can't request money for anything that would have been a gift. So if you said "I'll buy your dress" you cant now go against that. If you paid for makeup upfront with the agreement she would pay you back then you can ask for that money still.

    Either way, it could definitely make it harder on your brother if you asked for the money back, as I wouldn't be surprised if she backlashed to him about that.

    I'm so sorry to you and your family! I hope it all works out without too much heartache

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  • M
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Mackenzie ·
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    That makes total sense. Thank you for your advice 🙂
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  • N
    NewEnglandSettler ·
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    That sucks. I'd probably hold off bringing it up until after the wedding and give your brother and her some time to figure out where they go from here. Good luck to you all.

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  • C
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
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    I’d be less concerned with getting your money back and more focused on supporting your (if I understand correctly) brother, who’s wife just left him…
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  • Janet
    Expert October 2018
    Janet ·
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    Same thoughts

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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    This.

    Your poor brother. He'll need your love and support.

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I agree with this! I would definitely focus more on being there for your brother at this time.
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  • M
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Mackenzie ·
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    Thank you for your advice! There are definitely a few things that need to be sorted before I do any requesting of money.
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  • Candace
    Super March 2022
    Candace ·
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    Since it just happened, being your bridesmaid is probably not the number one thing on her mind right now. After some time maybe she will offer the dress back or money, but don't count on it. Best just to be supportive and not focus on the that stuff. Sorry you lost a bridesmaid though!
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  • Vicky
    VIP January 2020
    Vicky ·
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    No, you absolutely cannot ask her for money for things you chose to purchase or book for her for your wedding. Especially the thank you gift items.

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