Hi all
I’m having a bridesmaid dilemma which is giving me anxiety at the moment!
I’m planning my wedding for early 2024 so want to ask my bridesmaids fairly soon. I have 3 sisters, 3 sister in laws and 2 of my closest friends that I plan to ask.
I have a friend who was my best friend through high school / college years but over time we have drifted for various reasons and as we no longer live in the same area I see her a few times a year (with the rest of my oldest friends). A few weeks after I got engaged, she drunkenly told me that I would be her maid of honour. I felt like it was quite a selfish thing to say and put me in an awkward position (also to add that she is currently single and said this in front of all of our other friends, so I felt like she was just fishing for me to say it back).
She can be a little clingy and overbearing sometimes and in the past has gotten jealous over my current best friends. I know she is expecting to be a bridesmaid as she still sees me as her best friend and I’m now dreading asking the rest of the girls and hurting her feelings. Apart from the fact I already have 8 bridesmaid which is a lot, I don’t want to ask her for the sake of it. Non of my other friends would expect it.
I’ve spoken to a couple of our mutual friends about this, who also understand how sensitive she can be and they think I should message her before asking anyone else just to give her the heads up (because of her MOH comment). In my opinion, this feels a little like I’d be apologising for something when I don’t feel like I should have to. Equally I can see how it may soften the blow, but I feel like it could turn it a huge drama/confrontation too, not to mention that I wouldn’t even know how to word the message without sounding patronising! My bridesmaids will probably also all post their bridesmaid “proposals” to social media so she will see it.
Please could I have some advice as it’s really putting a dampener on something that should be fun 
xoxo
