I’ll try to keep this short. My fiancé’s brother Joe* has been with his significant other for about 4-5 years now and they’re engaged. Joe has had a drug problem for the last decade. He’s been fine for the last year, it seemed like treatment had finally stuck. Joe was living with his fiancée and her family, and he was holding down a job. About a week and a half ago, his fiancée’s family found out that he was stealing their prescriptions and kicked him out. Joe is living with his parents at the moment and they’re trying to help get him back on track. Joe’s fiancée is getting fed up at this point and told him she needs some space and that their relationship is over if he can’t get clean.
Over the last 4-5 years, I’ve become pretty close friends with Joe’s fiancée. She is absolutely someone I want to continue to be friends with regardless of if her and Joe stay together, which is part of why I asked her to be in my wedding party. I also thought it would be a nice gesture since we’d be sister-in-laws (or co-sister-in-laws, whatever). Wedding etiquette, as far as I’m aware, would be to let her make the decision of whether or not to be in my wedding party if they broke up. It would be rude of me to tell her she can’t be in the party anymore and I don’t want to kick her out. I like her more than I like Joe and I’m closer with her.
My dilemma is: if they break up and aren’t on great terms, would I be in the wrong for keeping my fiancé’s ex in my wedding party? TIA
