The only non-family member in the bridal party was a childhood friend of mine. I toyed back and forth of whether to ask her to be a bridesmaid or not, and eventually decided to include her. That was my mistake.
She lives in a different state than me so went dress shopping by herself. I told her to get a long dress in a specific colour and then said I needed to double check the material and would get back to her. A little while later I got a message from her that she had bought the dress and she sent me a photo of it. It was the wrong material (satin instead of chiffon). Then covid hit and everything closed down.
When places re-opened I asked her to go exchange the dress and a few weeks before the wedding she did. This was where I made another mistake. I didn't ask to see the dress before she bought it and the first time I saw it was when we were doing bridal party pictures after the first look.
Intertwined with all of this, I sent a message to all of my bridesmaids telling them what style and colour of shoe to get. I also told them that the ceremony was on grass so to wear something comfortable to walk in. During this time, I had a side conversation going with this specific bridesmaid about not wanting my bridesmaids to wear shoes that made them taller than me, but that I was being selfish and petty in wanting that so I didn't specifically request it. So she knew how I felt about it.
WELL. She ended up with a dress that was the right colour and right material BUT it was one of those "illusion" long dresses. Meaning her legs are all out in literally all of our photos. (shown below. I cropped them for privacy). when I saw the photos I was annoyed/angry/upset/sad. All of the emotions.
Not only that, but she got shoes that were so tall that she was stumbling around all night and then FELL while she was walking down the aisle.
A part of me feels like she did this on purpose because she wanted to stand out and be different. I'm really annoyed and hurt by it, but I don't feel that it's worth talking to her because it's too late to change anything now.
Am I being overly sensitive? I feel like I can't print any of the bridal party photos. All I see in them are her legs.
