Bridal shower gift AND wedding gift?

Sorry -- just want to clarify-- I meant that the shower was planned after the invites for the wedding had already gone out. It was worded a little weirdly.

Most of the time you're supposed to give a gift at both the shower and the wedding, but I'm not sure what the etiquette is when money is the preferred gift, and the wedding and shower are so close in date.

I always bring a gift to both the shower and wedding. It doesn't have to be a big gift, just a token of gratitude for being invited to share in this exciting time. The fact that they have a preference for money over a boxed gift doesn't change my opinion of the situation.

Since they are two seperate events, I bring two gifts.

That was gracious of you to give her a check at her shower, but I would still give her a wedding present.

Regards of what kind of gift you want, brides have a shower for the experience of having a "bridal shower". And if you attend the bridal shower, I don't think you are exempt from a wedding gift because they are kinda two different things. One is just for the bride and the wedding gift is a gift for the Bride & Groom.

I normally don't give as big a gift for the bridal shower because it's more the fun of the shower rather than the gifts. I usually go on a group gift with a couple of the other ladies for the bridal shower. One bridal shower, her cousin and I went together on a very sexy lingerie because we always said that we would be giving her some sexy lingerie the day she got married and because it was definitely somthing that is tailored to her personality. I still got a gift for the bride & groom together but it was just a cheque too because they also preferred monetary.

Although I agree with that there should have been some "thank you" for the bridal shower gift. It's like giving thank yous after the wedding for people who came to attend and gave a gift. or she might just not have come around to it yet considering it was 2 weeks apart.

You need to give a gift at the wedding as well. Monetary or not.

Alright... Appears to be unanimous... I just thought it was weird to give her one check and then another. If I had thought about it I would have given her less or maybe a non monetary gift for the shower. Oh well I'll give her a new card ASAP bc I don't want to be rude since she is invited to my shower and wedding as well. Thanks everyone!

If you gave her a generous monetary gift for the shower, could you get her something for the wedding that is less value but is something material? Like a GC to a nice restaurant, or a nice bottle of booze?

That's an awkward situation. If you gifted her like you would have gifted for the wedding.. then I don't think there's anything wrong with gifting her a smaller amount for the wedding itself. I probably would have gotten her a gift card for the shower and money for the wedding, but like you said.. it wasn't very clear what you should do. Whatever you decide to do, she should be grateful.

If I give a shower gift, I don't give a wedding gift (which is common in my area and family) because they're both to celebrate a wedding. I didn't know two gifts were the norm in some areas until I joined WW! That said, I spend a lot in shower gifts.

I think it depends on how much you gave her. If you gave her $100, then I think you're fine. If you gave her $20, then I'd give something more at the wedding.