Bridal shower. Future husband and his family?

Sounds fine to me. The more help to carry gifts out, the better.

Coed showers are normal in some social circles. There shouldn’t be any issue with it

This is old tradition where the partner come at the end, say hello and thank you, and load the gifts. As host, FMIL probably thought this was the appropriate time when the men of the family make a showing. The brother doesn't really need to come if the toddlers create a safety concern or a distraction.

I’ve been to many showers where the “menfolk” sometimes friends, sometimes family show up at the very end. It’s common and not a big deal as long as they don’t show up too early. If FI is hanging out with the dad, brother and his children during the shower, or the brother is giving FMIL a ride home or something then it may also make practical sense.


I don’t know that the brother has to make a special trip other than for FMIL to briefly show off the grandkids, but it’s also not likely to affect anything since the shower is over at that point.

I think whatever YOU want goes.
I had a couple uncles at the end of mine, bc the guys hung out during the shower (my husband, my dad, one aunt’s husband who drove her to the shower, and one uncle who was just local and wanted to see family — they all went to lunch while we “showered”). They just joined the party when they returned and I loved it, but if it’s not YOUR thing, just say “no thank you, I’d like to keep it traditional”

It’s really up to you. Mine was held in a community clubhouse with a pool table in an adjacent room. My husband, his dad, and his grandfather hung out there and popped in periodically for food and stuff. They actually joined when opening gifts since these household items were just as much my husband’s as they were mine, so he opened gifts with me.