Bridal shower etiquette inviting neighbours

Good question... Bump...

I have no idea

Hmmm...that is a good question - sorry no idea.

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I think you should invite her, she asked to go. If I mentioned a shower and you didn't invite me I would be more offended than going to the shower and not the wedding.

I'm horrible with confrontation haha I would probably just try to avoid the topic and hope she forgets about it but that's a horrible way to deal with things (I need to work on my bridal balls)

Thanks. Keep your thoughts coming!

If you are not close with the neighbor, I would feel weird if they came to my shower and brought a gift then even more so if they were at the wedding. When my sister got married, she got gifts from two neighbors and they were not invited. They saw the blurb in the paper and just came over with a gift. On the day of the shower, you might just sent someone over and see if she wants to come in - that would remove the formality, but then she also might mention wanting to attend the wedding....

Does she absolutely know that she isn't on the wedding guest list? My concern would be that if you invite her to the shower, she will think she is invited, or expect to be invited, to the wedding.

If she definitely knows she isn't on the wedding guest list, then I think it's up to the hosts if they want to extend the invitation. You are right that it technically is not correct but SHE is the one expressing interest so I don't think it would hurt.

I agree with Emily-- are you sure she realizes that she's not invited to the wedding?

You should ask your daughter and the hosts of the shower.

Does your neighbor know she's not invited to the wedding? If not - inviting her to the shower could get tricky fast. She might assume and later ask you about where her wedding invitation is.

Thanks for your comments.

As to whether she knows that we aren't inviting them to the wedding, it's never been discussed. I don't think she'd be expecting it ....we've never really been "friends", just neighbourly. .

I've wondered if I should be honest about my dilemma and tell her that I feel awkward about the whole situation, or just send the shower invite and not stress about it.

Personally, I would go to her home in person and tell her that you would love if she wanted to come to the shower but due to budget restraints you weren't able to invite her to the wedding. She might just want to be apart of the celebration and a bridal shower is a great way to do it! But I think you really should invite her if you have room, which it sounds like you do, and just explain the situation to her, I think she would understand!

Thank you all for your input.

Future Mrs Elliott... agree completely that is that is the best way to handle the situation, I just need to find the courage and the right way to say it!

I'm likely worrying far too much about this...."don't sweat the small stuff", right?

Many thanks ladies and best of luck with all your wedding planning.

I think the best idea is to be upfront with her about the wedding. If she still wants to come to the shower then invite her. My sister had two of her friends ask if they could come to my shower while both acknowledging that they weren't invited to the wedding, so she invited them.

I would not invite her since she is not invited to the wedding. It was rude of her to try to invite herself, IMO.