Bridal Shower Budget

So I’ve personally only ever been to showers at homes or community rooms of a condo or apartment complex. I imagine a hotel would come with a food and beverage minimum and get expensive. I would let her plan it and only suggest the hotel if she asks for help on a venue.

The hostess should choose the venue, especially when it comes to a place that could be pretty expensive.

If she's hosting, it's basically her party and you're the guest of honor. She makes the decisions.

Typically brides are not involved in the planning of bridal showers. I've been to showers both at people's homes and at restaurants, and the ones at restaurants were supposedly very costly for the hosts. I would guess that having a shower at a hotel would be pretty costly as well, but shouldn't your FMIL make the decision anyway if she is the one throwing the shower?

I can get expensive having it at a hotel. I know from experience. Also if you really like a venue and have ideas for YOUR bridal shower, speak up. You only get married once and it you experience try and enjoy it. Ask for what you what!

My default: take your cues from the person hosting and paying. If a friend invited you out for a meal and ordered both a starter and an entree and multiple cocktails, feel free to do the same. If they only order an entree, I’d do the same. Since your FMIL is the host, let her make the decisions. If she asks you about your ideas or preferences, you can mention that you really like this hotel and it might be a good venue.

If you’re not paying for it ideally you shouldn’t choose the location. It’s always more expensive to do it at a hotel as opposed to a hall rental or a house. It may be more that what she would want to budget and yes it would be rude to ask.

I do not know for sure but honestly my shower likely cost around $50 (<$100) total. My mom and aunt planned the shower, and we used her neighborhood "clubhouse" which did not have a cost as long as she (the resident of the neighborhood) scheduled the reservation. The highest single cost was the cake that was ordered, with a majority of the other costs being toward food items - think veggie tray, mini chicken salad croissants, meatballs, meat/cheese/cracker tray, etc. There were some cute decorations, but nothing over the top.

If she has reached out to you and asked for a location, it may be worth calling the hotel and getting pricing info (ex: is this just a lunch reservation in their restaurant or you're wanting a conference room?), but at the same time for a shower I'd always recommend going with someone's home if available or maybe a private room at a restaurant...the shower shouldn't be a big ticket item when it comes to cost.

It literally does not matter what showers "normally cost" (even if there was such a figure, which there isn't because what is "normal"?). It ONLY matters what the host's budget it, and that's between your FMIL and her finances.

Do not "send her a pitch". If (and only if) she asks for your input on venue, you can mention the hotel you like, but then drop the subject and let her do the planning.

Every hotel is different, I assume most hotels want you to use their food & alcohol. My shower was at my house. Typically the host picks the shower location, not the bride. I think my mom spend around $1,000 on my shower and it was at her house.

Agree with others that unless you've been asked for your suggestions, it's probably best to keep your ideas to yourself. Also, there are so many factors that will affect price, but FWIW, I hosted 25 women for a luncheon reception at a chain sit down restaurant (nicer, but not high-end) for about $800 (food, beverages, tax & tip), the cake, decor, etc. were probably another couple hundred, so easily $1000.