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Jessica
Beginner October 2019

"Bridal Shower" After Privately Marrying

Jessica, on October 11, 2019 at 9:06 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 8
So my fiance and I were planning a large, traditional, expensive wedding for February but about a month or two ago, we decided to cancel it to privately marry on our seven year dating anniversary (which is next weekend). A couple of my friends / coworkers still want to throw me a bridal shower of some sort to celebrate this time in my life, however, it wouldn't be held until after we are already married due to everyone's busy schedules. I feel weird about a "bridal shower" AFTER being married. Of course I want to celebrate with them but I just don't want it to feel weird or gift grabby. They have assured me that no one would feel that way because they all just want to celebrate me. Any thoughts on how to word it other than bridal shower?
Note: It is a large group of coworkers that I'm close to that are offering to throw this "bridal shower". All of our family and close friends live out of state so they would not be coming. We are hosting a nice dinner in February for those close family members and close friends to celebrate our marriage since we canceled the wedding.

8 Comments

Latest activity by Cher Horowitz, on October 12, 2019 at 1:26 PM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Typically I would share your feelings about not having a shower when you're already married, but if everyone that will be in attendance already knows and is okay with it, I don't see a problem.

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  • Kiley
    Expert November 2019
    Kiley ·
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    Maybe call it a "celebration of marriage" party or gathering?

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  • L
    Lady ·
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    I think work and church showers are almost always the exception to most etiquette rules. I think if they are ok with it, i would ask that they invite only your group of coworkers. As long as they know you're getting married, i think it's ok.

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  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    If they're fine with it, go for it! Maybe bring the cake or dish to thank them too! Smiley smile

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  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    I wouldn't feel weird about it, they're still trying to "set you up" to be a married couple in the traditional sense. You throwing your own shower after the fact would be gift-grabby.

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    I think it'd be ok to still call it bridal shower
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  • Jeanie
    Super February 2020
    Jeanie ·
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    If that’s what they want to do, they are free to do so. You’re not asking for it, and you’re not planning it. They’re just happy for you and want to do something nice to celebrate your wedding. I say stop stressing over the etiquette rules and enjoy it!
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  • Cher Horowitz
    Master December 2019
    Cher Horowitz ·
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    If that's what the hosts want to call it, I see no issue with calling it a bridal shower!

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