Kylie
Dedicated October 2022

Bridal Party

Kylie, on October 11, 2019 at 9:59 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 14
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I’m doing a DW. Both FH and my family are spread all over the country. With that being said our bridal parties are coming from 4 different states. Out of courtesy for them, should I pay for their accommodations? I fully plan on paying for the bridesmaids dresses. I think it’s tacky to ask someone to be apart of your wedding and expect them to pay $XX amount for the dress you want them to wear. But as for hotel stay? Yay or nay?

14 Comments

  • Caytlyn
    Champion November 2019
    Caytlyn Online ·
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    It depends on your budget. I'm sure it would be appreciated, but not expected.

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  • V
    VIP July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I don't think it is expected. For our wedding everyone had to travel. My husband is from New Jersey and I'm Pennsylvania so we got married in between so it was about an 1.5 hours for most people. However, the best man lives in California and one groomsmen lives in Ohio so they had to book at hotel room. The rest of the bridal party lives in either New Jersey or Pennsylvania. Some of them choose to spend the night and others drove back home after the wedding. That was their decision. We didn't pay for their hotel accommodations nor did we pay for their attire, but we talked to them about their budgets. Honestly most people know when they accept the position of being in a bridao party there are certain costs included.
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  • Jodie
    Savvy April 2020
    Jodie ·
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    We are in the same boat. We didn’t pay for the attire but did pay for the accommodations for our bridal parties. I don’t think it’s necessary but a nice gesture to contribute something (whether it be travel or attire or lodging) if you’re able since a destination wedding is most likely going to cost your party more than a local one would
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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    I understand that of course, I just think the dress thing is tacky, especially when the likelihood of them wearing it again is slim. And I’m super picky about everything matching color and dress type. We’re having wedding in Tennessee. 2 bridesmaids are coming from Florida, one from Texas, one from Oklahoma, groomsmen 2 from Texas, one from South Carolina, and one from Arkansas. So 90% of guests will be needing hotels
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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    Thanks for the input
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    I would if it's in the budget to do so, since it will cost them a lot to even get there.

    Also, kudos about the BM dresses - I did the same and can't believe so many ppl are ok with essentially charging their friends for the honor of standing up with them in a wedding.

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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    That’s exactly how I felt. I’ve been in several weddings and I’ve always said, even way before I got engaged. When my time came I wouldn’t make them pay for it.
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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    If you can afford their hotel room's, I think that's a great thing to do! Typically brides should consult bridesmaids about their budget prior to picking a dress if they expect them to pay for it, but it's nice you paid so you didn't have to do that!

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  • Jeanie
    Super February 2020
    Jeanie ·
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    I don’t think you’re expected to pay for any travel expenses. Or their dresses either, so it’s already very nice you offered. I think destination weddings are also somewhat of a vacation for your guests. Yes, the reason they are going is for your wedding, but you aren’t going to monopolize their time there and make their entire getaway about you. They will have time to do things they want and enjoy. So if you’re bridesmaids are agreeing to be in your wedding and know it’s a destination, I don’t see why you would pay for their whole trip. If you’re loaded, that’s great and would be very gracious of you. But the reality is most of us don’t have that kind of money.
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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    The budget aspect I agree with but I see all too often different dresses or shades of color differences. So I personally feel it’s just easier to have it the way I want if I pay for it
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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    That’s a good view point I hadn’t thought of previously
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  • earias
    Champion December 2017
    earias ·
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    I agree with the above PPs that you are not required, nor is it expected, to pay for your wedding party's accommodations. However, the exception is if you require them to stay in a certain place then you would be expected to pay for those accommodations. As long as they are free to choose wherever they want to stay, then you're off the hook. Of course, if it is in your budget then go for it. I had a semi-DW and chose to pay for everyone's (not just my wedding party) accommodations that weekend because it was in my budget.

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  • Kylie
    Dedicated October 2022
    Kylie ·
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    We’re having it in TN so I guess that would be considered semi DW there’s way to many people coming for me to pay for everyone’s accommodations but I like your viewpoint on it. If I’m not requiring they stay at a certain place.
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  • Yoice
    VIP March 2019
    Yoice ·
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    If you can afford it then is a nice gesture to do so it takes the bill out of their hands. Is not required or expected but is something they’ll appreciate.
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