Bridal party proposal

I’d wait for about 8-10 months unless it’s a destination wedding. Then a year out is okay so they have time to arrange for travel.

I'd wait at least a year out.

I'd wait until you're around a year out before asking! It's definitely exciting to ask them, but you don't want to ask too soon. Relationships do change sometimes, and once you ask someone to be in your wedding party, you can't really un-ask them without risk of ruining the friendship. It doesn't hurt to wait until a year out, since there's nothing they would need to do between now and then anyway.

View Quoted Comment That is very true! Thank you.. and it gives me time to build their proposal kit

I ask my bridal party at just under a year away. I asked once we had set a date and venue!

We got engaged 14 months before our wedding date, but pretty much as soon as I had a date and location nailed down (just over a year out) I asked! We're doing a destination wedding so I wanted to give them as much of a head's up as possible.

It’s usually advised to wait until 8 to 12 months out, in case friendships change. I asked my bridal party about 18 months out though. The people standing with me have been my best friends for 14+ years, so I’m not worried about changing my mind or the friendships changing.

Everyone has given good advice about reasons to wait. But in addition to the possibility of friendships changing over time (which no one ever thinks will happen to them), there is also the real risk of being disappointed that the people you choose don't/won't/can't maintain a high level of excitement over a sustained period of time, which can lead to hurt feelings.

You're excited now. Anyone you ask will probably be excited when you ask them. But then real life kicks in, the months go by, and everyone but you and your future spouse have other things on their minds and don't keep the wedding at the top of their priority list. This is completely normal and no big deal, but there have been a lot of threads here complaining about this. Keeping your expectations realistic (and involving people at the right time instead of too early) is the key to preventing these kinds of hurt feelings.

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LOVE THIS!!! That does make a lot sense!

I don't know.. I was wondering the same thing. Are you sending proposal gifts as well. Im trying to go by this wedding planner that I purchased.

About the proposal kit…I know the wedding industry and Instagram would like it to seem that these are necessary. Sometimes I wonder if it doesn’t put pressure on people to say “yes”.

About the proposal kit…I know the wedding industry and Instagram would like it to seem that these are necessary. Sometimes I wonder if it doesn’t put pressure on people to say “yes”.

There are many posts on the forum via the search feature of brides asking the wrong people 1-3 years ahead of the wedding and wanting them to step down while still being friends. Having them step down is a friendship ending move. There is nothing they need to do before 6-9 months beyond trying on dresses, and so many companies now are online which cuts Dow production time.



Ask your closest support system people in a regular conversation with no gifts to pressure anyone no earlier than 6-9 months before the wedding. Be very clear about any and all expectations before they commit.

If the wedding is 2023, I wouldn't ask anyone until early 2023. Since there's two years before the wedding, that is a good amount of time for relationships to change.

So much good info here. Not only is it possible for relationships to change, but sometimes life can be finicky as well. Plus your bridal party is your “hype squad” and you don’t want to ask too early and then risk their enthusiasm fizzling out. I’m getting married 11/22 but I’ve already asked my friends/family if they would stand by me on my day. They are my sisters and closest friends I’ve had for decades. I didn’t do any proposal kits or anything (although they are fun ways to ask). That can tack on valuable money in the wedding budget and sometimes it does put some pressure on others to say “yes”. When in 2023 did you set your date for?

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Oct 7th alternate date April 15th. We are waiting on venue confirmation because a lot of them are getting booked up. At least we will have that out the way.

View Quoted Comment Wow they are booking up fast!! Yes it’s great to have the venue and date all set. Helps relieve a little stress.

I'm getting married in 2023 as well and I say if know for sure who you want there's no harm in asking now. I'm still unsure so I'm giving myself a deadline of 12 months before the wedding. All of the parties and stuff (except the engagement party) won't happen until then anyway. I'm getting them gifts and a card that asks them to be my bridesmaid.

View Quoted Comment Same here… that’s kind of what I want to do. I already know who my maid of honor and matron of honor is