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Just Said Yes October 2022

Bridal Party moh

Marlene, on July 9, 2021 at 3:13 PM Posted in Planning 0 7

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We are getting ready to propose to our bridal party but I'm in a dilemma. I wanted my MOH to be my BF of 10+ years. We haven't really spoken or seen each other in about a year which is kind of weird for us lol.(Thanks covid and she also has a new boyfriend)
What has me at a pause of asking her is that she didn't reach out after my brother passed a couple months ago and yes she was aware.My other person is a cousin who has been there more in the past year than anyone has. Anyone have any similar issues how did you weigh out your cons with pros? Should I let it go and still ask her?

We've been engaged for 4 years and she did start helping plan at first but because of life we've had to push wedding back. She was also involved with proposal and making sure I was ready and everything so I do want her a part of it but I'm holding that grudge and don't know how to let it go. Anyone have an issue in deciding who they want as their MOH? Or just me 😅😂

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on July 9, 2021 at 6:08 PM

Champion July 2019
Veronica · on July 9, 2021 at 3:17 PM
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You still have plenty of time before you really need to ask so I would hold off since you aren't sure to see how your relationships develop. I would wait until about 8-10 months prior to your wedding to ask
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Super May 2021
Stacey · on July 9, 2021 at 3:17 PM
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It's WAY to early to decide if your wedding is next October. Maybe wait until the beginning of the year, and you might have more clarity by then! There is nothing your wedding party needs to do now, so if you're struggling with it, don't make a decision in haste that you will later regret (this board is full of brides in that exact situation).
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VIP January 2019
Maggie · on July 9, 2021 at 3:21 PM
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I agree with PP that you have time to wait on this decision. But what you should do now is work on repairing the relationship (not related to your wedding, but just because this is your best friend). Make the effort to get in touch and share with her how it hurt your feelings she didn't offer support when your brother died. Her reaction will tell you if the friendship is worth saving.
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Dedicated September 2021
Jessyca · on July 9, 2021 at 3:26 PM
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Agreeing with above posts but also mentioning that you don't NEED to choose a MOH - I just have 3 bridesmaids who have shared the responsibility of planning the bach and I text all 3 in a group message when I need help with something.
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Super May 2019
KYLIE · on July 9, 2021 at 3:39 PM
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I am so sorry to hear about your brother. Put aside wedding planning and reach out to your friend point blank to say how much it hurt when she wasn’t there when you needed her. Figure out what’s going on in your relationship.

Come this October, when your wedding is one year away, decide who you’d like as your MOH.
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Dedicated October 2022
Viviana · on July 9, 2021 at 5:09 PM
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I agree - I think it's too early to to ask/make a decision/
I'm also an October 2022 bride and don't plan on asking anytime soon!
But, I also had this debate. I have my best friend of 10+ years who I thought would be my MOH - but unfortunately, I decided I will not ask her (instead I'm going to ask my sister). My bf and I have grown apart and haven't been too close and have bumped heads the last few years. She hasn't once asked me about the wedding or if I need any help - so I figure it's just not that important to her - which is fine - but I want/need someone more caring/proactive as my MOH - which is why I'm asking my sister (later next year). Do what feels right to you and don't worry about other people/their feelings (as mean as that sounds).
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Master May 2020
Kari · on July 9, 2021 at 6:08 PM
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There are no rules about who and who is not included in your wedding party or gets a special title. You don't need to have a MOH at all, or you can have two if you want.
If your wedding isn't until next October I really would wait to decide. I wouldn't ask people to be in your wedding party more than a year before your wedding (I think 6-10 months is the sweet spot) and you can also ask them to be bridesmaids then and designate an MOH closer to the actual wedding date if need be.
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