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Beginner October 2020

Bridal Party Craziness

S, on January 24, 2020 at 10:52 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 19

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Hello! I am looking for advice on our bridal party. I told my FH we could have 5 groomsmen and 5 bridesmaids. I had 4 for sure- my 2 lifelong best friends and my 2 sisters. He really wanted 5, so I said yes and was going to ask my close friend. Since that decision, I haven’t asked her and we’ve drifted apart. I have pretty much decided to not have her in the wedding party.

We have a few options here:
Cut a groomsmen, but this is not preferable obviously.
Have an uneven wedding party, but my FH really doesn't like this idea. I am also not huge on it because we both really like evenness.
Add his 8 year old sister as a JR Bridesmaid, but I do think this is really young when the rest are adults.
Add a different close friend of mine. I’m just not sure what’s usual with how close you are to your bridesmaids? This friend and I are really close but I see her as more of a mentor.
Any advice? Also we are open to additional ideas! Thanks guys. ☺️

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19 Comments

Latest activity by N, on January 28, 2020 at 2:07 PM

Master September 2020
Nicole · on January 24, 2020 at 11:17 PM
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Go with the uneven party. My FH didn’t love this idea either, but I convinced him that we shouldn’t add anyone just for aesthetics (he’s got 5 grooms people and I have 3). No one will pay attention to the difference, anyway.
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Master September 2020
Nicole · on January 24, 2020 at 11:18 PM
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*3 bridesmaids
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Beginner October 2020
S · on January 24, 2020 at 11:18 PM
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Thank you for the advice! He’s coming around to the idea so I hope we can keep it as the main consideration.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on January 24, 2020 at 11:21 PM
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Have uneven sides. It truly doesn’t matter and I promise that will be the last thing you’re thinking of on your wedding day.
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Champion July 2019
Veronica · on January 24, 2020 at 11:22 PM
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Definitely don't cut a groomsman as that would be a friendship ending move. Uneven would be totally fine. But if you really want to add someone, I would make it someone really close to you. I had my brother on my side because him and I are really close and he wouldn't have been included as a groomsman. Do you have other friends or family that you are close to that's male or female?
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Beginner October 2020
S · on January 24, 2020 at 11:26 PM
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My brother is already one of his groomsmen because they have a good relationship. I don’t have any other close family members. Like I said, I would consider my close friend but I’m just not sure what the etiquette is on how close is close to be in a bridal party. I know it’s just who I want up there but I just don’t know what that really means honestly. 😂
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Beginner October 2020
S · on January 24, 2020 at 11:26 PM
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That’s true!
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Champion July 2019
Veronica · on January 24, 2020 at 11:29 PM
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Is there someone else he would want as a groomsman and your brother could be on your side?
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Beginner October 2020
S · on January 24, 2020 at 11:30 PM
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Maybe. He has a few other close friends and family members he may consider. I honestly hadn’t thought of that and that may be a really good option.
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Champion July 2019
Veronica · on January 24, 2020 at 11:33 PM
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I would discuss it with him if it really bothers both of you that you could potentially have an uneven wedding party.
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Master October 2021
Sexypoodle · on January 25, 2020 at 1:09 AM
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If you’re stretching your brain this much and have to ask others about who should be a bridesmaid, then they shouldn’t be selected. You knew right away about your 4 girls. So it should come as naturally as that. Otherwise it’s a “just because” person that you’re using like an extra in a movie, simply for the “evenness”.
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Super August 2021
Dierdra · on January 25, 2020 at 2:13 AM
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You could also add in the junior. I am having my little sister in it MOH 2nd (mainly because I love her lol) but she really won't be participating in any of the planning/parties. But she has loved dress shopping, practicing holding my flowers and fixing my veil lol. And family will always be family.
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Master November 2022
Chrysta · on January 25, 2020 at 7:38 AM
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I second the idea of your brother standing with you & him choosing another close friend to be on his side. When choosing who to stand with you, I would consider who has been there for a long time, who has seen you through the best & worst times, and who you know will still be an important part of your life 10 years from now.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on January 25, 2020 at 10:59 AM
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I would do uneven because I just feel like adding someone just to make the numbers even doesn't make much sense if you hadn't considered them in the first place
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December 2020
Shelly · on January 25, 2020 at 12:05 PM
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It won't be that noticable. Don't worry.
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Master January 2021
Andrea · on January 25, 2020 at 8:24 PM
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I agree with Shelly
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Master September 2019
Sherry · on January 27, 2020 at 11:39 AM
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It is your FH's wedding as well. If he wants 5 on his side, he should get it and you will just have 1 less. It is ok to be uneven.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on January 27, 2020 at 1:30 PM
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Have an uneven party. It's SO common at weddings.
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Dedicated July 2020
N · on January 28, 2020 at 2:07 PM
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I’m doing uneven! 4 Groomsmen, 3 Bridesmaids!
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