bm Dresses

That is tough. Can you think of a reason why these 2 bridesmaids are stalling? Are they worried about their weight changing or something similar? Before I let myself get too frustrated, I would have an actual in person conversation with these 2 ladies. Reconfirm to that you want them in your wedding but want to make sure they are still committed. Maybe make sure they have a clear understanding of what you are asking them to order. Maybe offer to help them do the order right then and there. I don’t know what else to suggest

While it’s rude to just ignore you, if that’s what they are actually doing, it’s also a bit much that you are repeatedly checking up on them. Presumably they are adults who can figure out the actual deadline for ordering. Giving them the money takes it out of your hands. It’s their responsibility at this point to follow through.


How have you been contacting them? Are you sure they’ve even seen your messages?

View Quoted Comment Text message and it’s a normal convo and then I’ll ask, no response and then back to normal convo. I’ve asked twice over the past 3 months

View Quoted Comment I feel like at this point the only thing I’m looking for is a response not even a particular one. Im willing to work with the deadline but how can I when im not even getting answered. My bachelorette is mid July and shower is September which is another reason why I made the deadline July because everyone will be busy and such. I sent out a PowerPoint in April with every detail, date, etc for the bridesmaids as well. So I feel like im really going above and beyond to make it as simple as possible. They haven’t even ordered just 1 to try it on yet

How long does it actually take to order the dresses? Other than a heads up about lead times it’s up to them to determine how busy they are now or later. This is their problem. Don’t make it yours.


Also, texting is not a good means of communication. If these are your closest friends I assume you also talk to them.

Honestly, I would have just ordered them myself instead of sending people money. It’s super kind of you to cover the cost, but that took away your ability to control the timeline. Can you ask them to return the money and send you their size so you can place the order if they’re too busy?

View Quoted Comment One time I asked if one of them preferred I send them the money after they ordered it or if they wanted the money to order it. I got ignored for that as well. After a few weeks I said let’s order the dress asap! And got ignored on that as well

I completely understand as a bride we all strive to have all details taken care of as quickly as possible. However, there is still seven months until your wedding. That is way more than enough time for the girls to get their dresses ordered (usually BM dresses take 30-60 days, depending on where you are ordering from). Personally, I would never want to order a dress seven months out, as I would be afraid of weight fluctuations. Alterations add up quickly, so the closer you can get to the right size, the better. Your BM’s know your wedding date, and they know they will need to have their dresses in-hand and altered by then. I would stop micromanaging them (cuz that’s going to get real annoying real fast for everyone), and trust that they will get their dresses ordered in time. I wouldn’t mention it again until October. If they still have not verified they have gotten their dresses by then, I would reach out to them (by phone, not text message) and verify they either have the dress or it’s been ordered.

View Quoted Comment I think I’m more upset about the lack of communication, like idc if they order it or not at this point, I’m just more stressed that it’s not a lot of communication. I feel like as a BM it should be a simple text the first time I asked like hey I’m gunna order it around this time because of xyz and I would be totally fine with that. I think it’s just more worrisome that I can’t even get a response

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I would be very frustrated too. These are your friends and they should at least respond back to you with something. I guess worst case scenario, you have 2 fewer bms than originally expected. That would be really sad, but I don’t know what else you can do!

View Quoted Comment I would find new bridesmaids and ask for your money back. It’s completely inconsiderate to not respond to you. Not true friends.