BecomingBecker
Dedicated October 2020

bm dress issue...maybe

BecomingBecker, on February 11, 2020 at 2:08 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 20
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So my 17 year old sister is one of my bridesmaids and she called me worried last night. Doctors just discovered that she has PCOS and her testosterone and cortisol levels are off the charts high, they’re going to probably be putting her on meds for it which will probably cause her to lose weight (which is good news, she’s always battled her weight even though she’s active as hell and the poor girl has F cup chest)


Unfortunately the orders for BM dresses need to be in by mid March and we’re now worried that whatever size she fits in currently may be too big by the wedding...
Should we order a size down? Or take the gamble and hope they can take the dress in enough and order what she’s currently in?

20 Comments

Latest activity by Elizabeth, on February 16, 2020 at 5:25 AM
  • Anna
    Super August 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag

    There's a lot of options for bridesmaid dresses that wouldn't require you to order this far in advance. What's the reason you are ordering this early? Can you hold off until she knows more about the medication effects?

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  • BecomingBecker
    Dedicated October 2020
    BecomingBecker ·
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    The brand that when’re ordering from (mainly because they get a good discount since I got my dress from that shop) recommended that the order be in by mid March, and I’m gonna talk to the shop and see what the latest possible time would be for them to order their dresses...


    She has an appt with an endocrinologist this month and we’re hoping to have a clearer picture of what to expect then so...
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  • Anna
    Super August 2020
    Anna ·
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    Yeah I would see if you can push it out! Talk to the store about the situation and see what they think.

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    It's a lot easier to alter a size down than a size up. Order her current size and have her go through alterations a lot closer to the wedding.

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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    I’d order the size she is in mid March (if she’s between sizes then round down) and if she loses more weight she can have it altered
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  • MOB So Cal
    January 2019
    MOB So Cal ·
    • Flag

    Yeah, I'd mostly focus attention on how she's feeling. As someone who battled hormone/endocrine issues from the time I was 18 until we finally got pregnant when I was 36 (and then was in full menopause by 38), there is potentially a lot going on for her.... Intellectually, she's potentially grappling with lots of info and questions about what her diagnosis means, and anything hormone-related can mean she's feeling lots of things she doesn't understand/cannot control. I think checking with the bridal shop for the latest possible order date is great, and looking at styles that will adapt to different body dimensions is helpful, and finally, just reassuring her that a LOT can be fixed in last-minute alterations. I wish your sister, and you as her loving sister and part of her support system, well! Smiley heart

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  • BecomingBecker
    Dedicated October 2020
    BecomingBecker ·
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    Thank you!!! She’s unfortunately been through the ringer health wise for only being 17 and we’re kinda hoping that this discovery will answer a lot of other questions we’ve had (they’re thinking it might also be linked to her epilepsy, which came on at 12 and doctors have yet to discover why or find a way to really control it)


    She’s being resilient and I’m just hoping I can do what I can and need to do to make her not worry about things she doesn’t need to be worried about right now (aka my wedding)
    I love your ideas and it’s probably what I’m gonna end up doing!!!
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  • anna
    Devoted October 2019
    anna ·
    • Flag

    I would say order her current size, and then find a good seamstress to make any necessary alterations! you can always make a dress smaller, but you can't make a dress bigger. I bought my wedding dress off the rack and it was 6 sizes too big but after alterations you would never have guessed. seamstresses can work magic! best wishes for her health to improve!

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  • Taylor
    VIP October 2020
    Taylor ·
    • Flag

    Where are you ordering the dresses from? I know they tell you to order way in advance but they overshoot on time in my opinion. We're using Davids Bridal and they said it will take 4 months to get the dresses in once ordered but I had a bridesmaid receive hers in less than a month. If it's a super grey area on the sizing she'll need, I'd push it a month or two.

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  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
    • Flag
    I would order her current size. As a PCOS person, all those pills they put you on and tell you you could have dramatic weight loss... well they've lied. (Dont tell her that though, because I hope they work for her!)
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  • A
    Super August 2020
    Alex ·
    • Flag

    Order it in the size she is now and have a plan for alterations. A good seamstress should be able to help!

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  • Kathryn
    VIP August 2020
    Kathryn ·
    • Flag
    As someone who was diagnosed with PCOS as a teenager, it's a lot to deal with. When I got on birth control, my body wasn't sure what to do for several months. Then I did start losing weight, but it took months. I would order her size in March, which doesn't put pressure on her to lose weight. If she does, the dress can be taken in. Hormones really do affect your emotions, so she'll probably be all over the place. Just take care of her and don't stress.
    • Reply
  • Kelsey
    Savvy November 2020
    Kelsey ·
    • Flag
    As someone with PCOS and diagnosed at the same age a lot happens and meds do help but the weight loss isn’t as dramatic as one would think. Pcos is a struggle and they put you on a lot of medications to find what works seeing as pcos is a insulin resistance. Some meds have weight gain like BC as that’s a big factor with the symptoms, another they can do is metformin that is one that can cause weight loss it balances your insulin levels but can also make you sick if your taking to high of a dose. My advice is order in her size in March when it needs to be ordered and depending on the style you might be surprised on if it needs to be altered or not. My wedding dress is aline so my alterations are very minimal and really just under the bust where I lost weight as my chest size hasn’t changed with losing weight. It’s a lot to figure out at that age and I didn’t learn a lot about pcos until this year when I found doctors that specialize in it. Tell her to just take it one day at a time.
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  • Bride123
    Dedicated August 2020
    Bride123 ·
    • Flag

    My bridal shop told me it wouldn't be a big deal if I lost even 20-25 pounds in my very detailed dress -- the shape could still be salvaged. If the dress is plain maybe around the same would be true. I'm not sure when your wedding is but a 30 lb weight drop in say 3 months? would be pretty extreme. That would be 3 pounds a week, every week, for 12 weeks.

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  • Kevin
    Super October 2021
    Kevin ·
    • Flag
    One easy thing you can do is get a dress that is convertible they can go up or down a size in either direction and can be altered just by how you tie them on. David’s bridal and Azazie have a few. No alterations needed and are very size adjusting friendly
    • Reply
  • AnaA
    Savvy October 2026
    AnaA ·
    • Flag

    When I started my meds for PCOS I did lose weight but it was not dramatic or fast. I think you should try to order her dress at a later time and if you can not do that order her current size and if she loses more weight closer to the wedding take the dress to a seamstress.

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  • sierra
    Just Said Yes January 2021
    sierra ·
    • Flag

    I work in a dress shop. Dresses can be taken down up to two full dress sizes no problem, sometimes even more. Order her current size and then just take it in as needed. I've never seen anyone lose more than two dress sizes in the timeframe of purchasing the dress to wearing it.

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  • Pattie
    Expert June 2020
    Pattie ·
    • Flag

    I'd recommend purchasing the size she currently is. Then alterations can be made. Faster if you actually go through a tailor, rather than through a bridal shop. Then just rush order it if needed.

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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    Agreed that March is WAY early for bridesmaids dresses needed for an October wedding. Six months lead time isn't uncommon for a bridal gown, but bridesmaids dresses should be able to be ordered 2-4 months out without issue.

    If you haven't decided on exact dresses yet, consider a style that allows for easy alterations or that is a bit less structured and allows for a little bit more flexibility with fit. Stuff like structured, fitted, strapless dresses need to be pretty precise not to fall off and look good, but a-line halter or strapped styles have a little more leeway.

    Also, I'd suggest having your sister have measurements done now and then when she's measured again for the actual fitting you'll have a better idea of how much her size is fluctuating. When she's measured for the dress you can provide the shop with that info and it may help them better predict what size to order for her dress for the wedding. I wouldn't order too many sizes down because it's way easier to take in a dress that is a bit too large than to let out a dress that is too small. You can size a dress down by a least a couple sizes but you can really only go up one half to one size max if the dress is too small.

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  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth ·
    • Flag

    Definitely order the current size! Those meds do a lot of things and some people have huge changes in weight loss and others don't have any changes at all. It's a spectrum. I'd order the current size and then if she doesn't lose weight she won't feel guilty/embarrassed about the size being too small... Alterations can fix too big, can't fix too small.

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