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Just Said Yes September 2021

Birth control before wedding?

Annie, on December 3, 2020 at 12:37 PM Posted in Fitness and Health 0 21
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So we're getting married in September 2021 (Yay!) My fiance and I have been using the pill for a little over a year with no pregnancy scares (condoms before then). But I'm a little worried that an oops in the next several months would have me showing at the wedding (or worse, that I would need to make unscheduled dress alterations. Plus, some of my fiance's family is pretty conservative (we're both Catholic but his relatives are hard core) and we'd like to leave them their illusions about us and spare us any grief. :-) On the other hand, we both hate condoms, and we're wondering how much we really need them for the next few months if I'm careful about taking my pills (which I am). Any feedback, thoughts, or personal experience would be appreciated!

21 Comments

Latest activity by Julia, on July 30, 2021 at 9:50 PM
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag

    As long as you are taking your pills consistently then I think that you will be fine. If you want to be extra careful, you can just tell your fiancé to also use the pull out method on top of you taking the birth control pills.

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  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    Idk, I'm not a fan of the pill at all and would recommend condoms instead. If you absolutely have to take hormones to prevent pregnancy then I recommend the nuvaring.
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  • Jamie
    Dedicated July 2021
    Jamie ·
    • Flag
    Pills are 99% effective if taken properly. This might be TMI but I haven't used a condom in 4 years and no babies here. There is still a slim chance, of course. But I prefer birth control all day. Condoms breaks and that stresses me out more than taking a pill at the same time every day.
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    Birth control pills are 99% effective when used properly and 91% effective when used improperly. Obviously using two methods of birth control is more effective and, at the end of the day, preventing an unwanted pregnancy should be more important than your “hate” for condoms. Abstinence is 100% effective. 🤷🏻‍♀️
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
    • Flag
    As long as you are taking the pill correctly, you should be fine, as others have said. My husband and I have been using the pill as our only form of contraception for about 6 years now and I have never gotten pregnant, and I'm also not always the most diligent with it. Then again, I also have a friend whose mom was on the pill when she got pregnant with her. As Caytlyn said, the only 100% effective method is abstinence. Do what you two think is right for the two of you.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag

    I was on the pill for 4 years prior to getting married and never had any issues. The pill is 99% effective as long as you use it properly. Also, remember that certain medicine can impact the effectiveness of birth control. My husband also hates condoms so I knew there was way he would've agreed to use them. The only mentioned that is 100% effective is not having sex.

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  • A
    Devoted May 2021
    Ally ·
    • Flag
    If you take your birth control pills exactly as prescribed, the chances of accidental pregnancy are miniscule. People who claim they got pregnant while on birth control likely missed more than one pill or took a medication that caused the pills to not work
    • Reply
  • Jai
    Rockstar May 2020
    Jai ·
    • Flag
    I've been on birth control for 5 years now. My husband and I will use condoms if necessary (like on an antibiotic), but primarily I take the pill and he utilizes the pull out method. And we've been doing this for over 3 years.
    • Reply
  • mrswinteriscoming
    Rockstar December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
    • Flag

    I've been on the pill for 6 years this month and I've never had a slip up. The only time I haven't been able to rely on it entirely and have resorted to condoms (pull out method is not as effective) is when I've been on antibiotics or the one or two times I've switched pills.

    As long as you do not take any medication which will interact with the pill and otherwise take it as prescribed, you should be 99% safe and the chance of a slip up is unlikely.

    • Reply
  • L
    Dedicated August 2021
    Lw ·
    • Flag
    This is one of my fears too! Do you track your cycle? It gives me some relief and I know when high risk days are compared to days where it should be okay. Obviously not 100% but it gives me more piece of mind.
    • Reply
  • Christina
    Devoted July 2020
    Christina ·
    • Flag
    I’ve been on the pill for three years. No pull out method Over here and no baby scares. The pi works if taken correctly
    • Reply
  • Jasmine
    Devoted May 2021
    Jasmine ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Omg I agree, I loathe birth control pills. But they have other methods then just the pills or condoms. You can get the copper or hormonal IUD, diaphragm, spermicide sheets, spermicide foam, the patch, the shot, the bar that goes in your arm. Personally I hate synthetic hormones in my body. But either way there’s a lot of options.
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Super October 2021
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    I’ve been on birth control for several years, maybe 6-7+ I can’t remember exactly when I started. We’ve never had a scare and this is our only method of protection. I take it like clock work.
    • Reply
  • A
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Annie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I have heard conflicting reports about whether or not that does any good, whether the pill completely suppresses your cycle or not. If it does, there's no cycle to track and you aren't more likely to get pregnant at any particular point. Even so, I always keep track of where I am in my pack, and i am a bit more hesitant to have sex in the middle of my cycle and FH usually humors me. :-)

    • Reply
  • Annika
    Expert November 2020
    Annika ·
    • Flag

    I have had the copper IUD (Paraguard) since Nov 2018 and I love it since it uses no hormones and is 99% effective. We also use condoms (but not all the time) and with a pretty average sex life we haven't had any scares. I would talk to your doctor if you are interested in changing your birth control, and in my and my husbands personal opinion if you hate condoms its because you have a poorly fitting one. Check out MyOne condoms thats what we use and they're great!

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  • Katie
    Dedicated May 2023
    Katie ·
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    View Quoted Comment

    I second an IUD - I have a Mirena, which does contain hormones unlike Paragard, but it does have the added bonus for me of reducing my period down to almost nothing! There are some that last for just 3 years if you know you'll want to try for a baby soon, my Mirena is good for 5, and Paragard is good for up to 10 (though many women report additional protection for a couple years past these timeframes as well). Even if you want to start conceiving earlier, you don't have to wait - it's as simple as scheduling an appointment to remove your IUD. Insertion stinks, but not nearly as much as other people have made it out to be in my experience. I love not having to worry about whether I took the pill, the long-lasting protection, and the high efficacy rate. I'm on my second Mirena in 7 years and would recommend an IUD in a heartbeat!

    • Reply
  • Lauren
    Expert July 2021
    Lauren ·
    • Flag
    10 years on pill (for other reasons) and no issues or oopsies yet. Set an alarm to go off same time every day and take it then.
    • Reply
  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    Aside from complete abstinence from sexual activity, there is no form of birth control that is 100% effective. Unintended pregnancies have happened even with correct and consistent use of hormonal birth control (such as the pill), IUDs, and condoms, but they are rare. Having said that, many people use the pill, IUDs, condoms, and other forms of highly effective birth control (98-99.5% effective) for many years without ever accidentally conceiving a child.

    I personally hate the idea of adding hormones to my body and have never used a hormone based birth control method. But if the pill works for you, and you've used only the pill and no other backup from of birth control for the past year, why are you all of a sudden worried it won't work in the months leading up to your wedding? If you are on the pill and have no issues with it, I don't see why you wouldn't keep up the same routine and anticipate similar results.

    If you want to be "extra safe" but don't want to use condoms, you can always try tracking your ovulation and avoided sex during the time when you are ovulating and most fertile.

    • Reply
  • Erin
    Savvy September 2021
    Erin ·
    • Flag
    I went the IUD path. I hate, hate hormonal medications of any kind. I don’t trust them, especially in premenopausal women.


    So, that left us with only one 99% reliable method: the copper IUD. I have had it for over a year now and I regret nothing. I’ll have it removed in 2022 for when we try to conceive.
    I will most likely use it again if we decide we want a second kid and need a long-acting reversible contraceptive for pregnancy spacing. Eventually I’ll just have a tubal ligation.
    I would recommend it with caution because while it works for a lot of women, it also does NOT work for a lot of women. It’s also hella unpleasant to have it inserted into your uterus.
    • Reply
  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    Paragard isn't a drug, its a non-hormonal IUD that contains copper. The copper reduces sperm mobility and prevents a fertilized egg from implanting in the uterine wall. It does not contain hormones and does not release drugs into the blood system. Paragard is a medical device.

    No medical procedure is 100% without risk and few are 100% effective. Paragard is more than 99% effective at preventing pregnancy, requires no maintenance, remains effective for 10+ years, and has fewer side effects than hormonal based methods of birth control, including the pill and hormonal IUDs such as Mirena (note: Paragard is the only non-hormonal IUD available in the United States; there are other copper IUDs available in other countries though).
    Millions of women have successfully used Paragard and other copper IUDs to prevent unwanted pregnancies without any complications.

    Please don't fear monger on these forums. Yes, it is possible for an IUD to become embedded or perforate the uterus (two different things, btw) but the rates of these incidences are very low and ALL methods of birth control used by sexually active couples have risks. Hormonal methods of birth control can cause blood clots and affect fertility, not to mention weight gain, acne, and other side effects. Some people don't like the way condoms feel, they need to be used correctly every time they are used to be effective, and they can break. FAM (fertility awareness method) family planning doesn't work all that well in women who have irregular periods, irregular schedules, or any number of hormonal imbalances or medical issues. Couples should choose a pregnancy prevention method that works well for them, and sexually active biologically heterosexual couples are going to need to choose from options that are not perfect.

    I had a Paragard IUD for 15 years. My periods were not affected, I had no unwanted pregnancies, and I never experienced embedding, perforation, or any other dangerous complications from it. Having one inserted is uncomfortable, but the discomfort is momentary and quite tolerable (I've had 3 inserted, and it was the same each time). Paragard gave me control over my body in a way that didn't require upkeep, constant refills, or ongoing expenses, and that didn't introduce hormones into my body. It's an excellent form of contraception and many (but not all) women are good candidates for it. Anyone interested in switching their birth control should speak with their doctor about the pros and cons of all the options available and choose a method that works best for them. No method is 100% perfect.

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