Best Woman?

We have a Best woman, too! Just remind him that She is the one other person, besides you, that he will want up there with him, and that it will be more special to her if she is asked by him to stand on his side, than it would be to be asked by someone she doesn't know. Show him pictures of weddings that have a best woman to show him that it's not weird and won't look odd, either.

I agree with Bonnie, I would also mention to him that the ladies (or sometimes men!) that stand up on your side are people who important to you and that you are close with and know very well...and the same should be on his side..

A freind of mine has done this. her best freind that she has been freind with since childhood is a man. he is her MOH...i dont thin it would look weird at ll. theres no written rule that it has to be all girls on one side and all bys on th eother...its whoever YOU are closest with....and if that happens to be a girl for him well then there you go

Bride's often get "pushed" into having someone their Bridal Party that they don't know that well or are not close with. If she's his best friend I am totally surprised you haven't met her before so consider having her in your bridal party an opportunity to get to know her and form your own relationship with her.

If she's truly that important to him she'll likely be around for many other events in your life and it would be nice if the two of you got along and had that shared bonding experience as the foundation.

Having her stand up for him is also a great option, although still considered nontraditional more and more couples are opting to have a woman as a "best man"...I did a wedding two weeks ago where the groom's sister stood up for him and it was great!

If you want to honor her role as an important person in his life bu can't agree on an appropriate bridal party role for her perhaps she can be an usher, walk him down the aisle or do a reading as part of the ceremony.

I agree with the previous post... why haven't you met her yet?? Have him set up an evening for the three of you (and maybe some other friends) to spend time together. Don't feel like you *have* to ask her to be a BM, but at least take the time to get to know her. Give it a month or so and if you feel comfortable with her by then, you can ask her without feeling weird about it.

It would be nice if your FH was willing to break the "rules" and have her on his side, but no matter what you guys decide to do about this, you should at least meet his best friend!

Your finance' just wants you to have her in your wedding party. He is not asking you to have her as your maid or matron of honor. With that being said, you should be willing to get to know her, after all she if your finance' best friend and I am sure that you would want him to be associated with your best friend. It would be appropriate to have her as one of your bridesmaid if he does not want her as his "best woman". Actually, you and only you should always be his "Best" of anything. Make it a point to meet her and set aside some time for just the two of you, you never know what God would have the relationship to turn into. At least, give it a try. You would want him to do the same for you and it is only fair for you to give her a chance. If things do not work out, then approach him again and offer your concerns. At least you have tried to make it work.

One of my best friends is a guy and mentioned the other day being the best woman- which i'm no sooo sure about, lol. I would prefer to be a bridesmaid myself- I always think of the wedding party as the bride's and groom's closest friends but i can see how that would be weird if you never met her. Just ask your FH who would do the bachelor party and such? cuz that was my concern

Just to clarify, he and I met at college and I've only been out to Nebraska (where he's from) twice... and she wasn't home either time (she was also away at school). So, being around 600 miles away, meeting her and having a dinner together isn't really an option It would also be very difficult for her to help with the bridal shower etc...

Thanks for all your advice! I think I'm going to stand my ground and hopefully he'll see my point of view Being able to choose my own party is very important to me and putting all of his friends in it isn't exactly what I have in mind. Thank you all so much!

I agree that you shouldn't be pushed into having just anyone in your bridal party. Your MOH and BMs should be those ladies (or gents) that you are closest too. If all else fails and he doesn't want her as his 'BW' then definitely try to incorporate her into the ceremony as a reader or the like. I really like the idea of her escorting him down the aisle. Good luck!

I totally agree! You shouldn't be forced to have someone on your sude of the bridal party, If he doesn't wnat her on his side, maybe she can do something else like carry the unity candle or hand out the programs, even mc!

Like the PP stated, it would be more meaningful for him to have her on his side. My FI is having a "groomswoman" and I am having a "bridesman." They are friends who mean so much to use and it just makes more sense having them stand up for us - her on his side and him on my side. We are actually looking forward to being a little "different." As the other posters have said, it would be good for you to get to know her but I can understand your predicament. My FI hasn't met my bridesman for similar reasons.