Being someone’s bridesmaid

It's normal for bridesmaids to pay for their dresses. If the bride is requiring that her bridal party have professional hair and makeup done, she should be paying for it. If it's optional, each bridesmaid can opt in or out and pay themselves.

As for the food, my bridal party just went in together on food for the morning of before I could even think about it. I brought it up one day and they said they already had something planned. Wasn't anything fancy, just some deli subs, Chick-Fil-A nuggets, fruit, and chips.

The dress thing is definitely normal, usually bridesmaids do buy their own dresses. The food part can be decided. I'm assuming she is just asking you to chip in? I'm not getting ready with my bridesmaids but if I was, I know I wouldn't need them to chip in for simple light snacks. I would just buy them myself. I'd ask her if everyone is chipping in, or what's going on with that.

She said we’re all on our own or maybe we’ll chip in pizza. And she said the girl and makeup thing is a definite we have to pay for because she wants us to have the same colors on with makeup

I am not paying for the dresses for my bridesmaids and I made hair/make up optional. My MOH decided to handle brunch. An older bridesmaid volunteered to handle the bach party because she's been to/done alot of previous ones and my Matron of honor (who can't come to my bach party) is doing a shower. My maid of honor wanted to contribute so she decided to help out with that the day of

Awesome. Thank you all!

Sounds like she should be paying for hair and makeup if she wants you all to have the same look. And, I think it is just a courtesy that the bride pay for the lunch/snacks if you are all getting ready together. I'm paying for hair and makeup and going to have food available. I can't imagine my ladies having to open their wallets to shell out money for food while they are there to support me on my big day.

View Quoted Comment Same here. We went to brunch together and just paid our own meals but I hadn’t even thought about oh maybe I should have paid we just naturally went and got our own

Is hair & makeup required? Or can you do your own and save money? Can you just bring your own snacks or do you have to pay for specific food? I personally paid for all the bridesmaids HAMU and breakfast and lunch, I think it's rude to ask them to cover all that.

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Since she said it is definite that you have to get your hair and makeup done by her makeup artist, she should be paying for it for everyone. If it was optional, then she could request you pay for it if you wanted to have it done.

It seems weird to me to ask the BMs to pay for their own food, but I have no idea if this is normal, or not.

Having bridesmaids pay for their own dresses is completely normal. But having bridesmaids pay for their own hair and makeup is NOT normal (unless hair and makeup is optional). If the bride is requiring that you have your hair and makeup done a certain way because she wants a certain look, then she needs to be the one paying for it. I have also never ever heard of bridesmaids being asked to pay for their own food---that is really bizarre!

Since we will be getting ready until about 12:30, I feel that my bridesmaids are sort of trapped (in a way), so I need to provide food. If you are out and about before getting ready, I could see where everyone would buy their own.


Agree with PPs on makeup and hair. Mine’s optional, everyone opted in so they will pay. That said, I’m currently searching for the hair and makeup options that are least costly to the bridesmaids, even if the bridal makeup ends up costing me more.

You have the option of doing your own hair and make-up, but if you receive on site services for HMU you do pay.

View Quoted Comment No bride can require you to get make up and hair done a certain way.

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Nope! If she's requiring hair and makeup done by a professional. she pays for it. Just tell her it's not in your budget and you'll be doing your own.