Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Beginner November 2020

Bartender and Alcohol

Morgan, on May 11, 2020 at 6:13 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 16

Saved

Flag
Hide content

I'm faced with a dilemma.

We're having a small, 25 adults over the drinking age, wedding.
I'm trying to decide if we should hire a bartenders do a cash bar or supply alcohol and have it be a serve yourself. I'm mostly concerned about guests taking advantage and getting hammered. There's a few options I've thought of.1) Limit alcohol to cocktail hour and then non alcoholic after other than toasts. Guests can go get a drink when it's time. 2) Same idea as above but each guest gets 3 drink tickets to use for alcohol through the night. No drink ticket no alcohol. There will be plenty of non alcoholic options. 3) Trust that people will be responsible but have a plan in place for if things get out of hand. 4) hire a bartender, make them aware of certain people who may become inebriated. Cash only bar, last call at 930 (1hr before send off)
I'm aware I sound like a b**ch. But I've dealt with far too many issues with alcohol related to my relatives so I know how they are. I'm trying to cut costs as well since we're over budget already. So it's pretty much coolers with drinks (hope people be responsible) or cash bar and a tender and that additional cost.

Flag
Hide content

16 Comments

Latest activity by Jana, on May 15, 2020 at 4:25 PM

Champion October 2018
Kelly · on May 11, 2020 at 6:20 PM
Flag

Hide content
So usually a bartender wouldn’t provide the alcohol, you would still need to provide it unless you are talking about a bartender that works for your venue. So I’m not sure a cash bar with you hiring a bartender is an option. In your case I would hire a licensed bartender and do beer and wine only that you purchase beforehand. The bartender should cut off anyone who is getting too inebriated. Drink tickets people lose or pass off to other people and cocktail hour only means people chug drinks and double fist and get drunk quicker before they stop serving.
- Reply
Super September 2019
Courtney · on May 11, 2020 at 6:23 PM
Flag

Hide content
If it were me, I would hire a bartender. Then I t’s their job (literally) to be vigilant of guests consumption and they can cut people off. You could limit it to beer and wine to save money and slow peoples roll lol. It’s an additional cost but I think it’s worth the peace of mind.
- Reply
Super September 2020
Leanne · on May 11, 2020 at 7:03 PM
Flag

Hide content
We’re doing beer and wine only (cheaper and limits any drunkenness ). We have bartenders and only purchased a certain amount. Once it’s gone it’s gone. Just tell them to cut anyone off who is drunk or out of line, and focus on enjoying your special day.
- Reply
Dedicated June 2016
Amazing · on May 11, 2020 at 7:38 PM
Flag

Hide content
You could do a self serve with beer, wine and maybe an adult punch or two, and when it's out it out they are cut off so that way noone gets too fluffy but they had a drink or two offered to them. Most webs say 1-2 drinks or person per hour. A bottle of wine serves 6 glasses, 5 L wine box= 21 glasses. For such a small crowd, beer can be canned/bottled instead of kegs, making counting easy, A punch depends on the recipe, but can be adjusted in servings. You could offer an Italian soda bar or regional drink( my fam from NYC so I did egg creams) to appeal to them more than alchol or do a fun alchol free wedding, which pintrest has tons of ideas for.
- Reply
Champion June 2019
Gen · on May 11, 2020 at 7:38 PM
Flag

Hide content
I would provide your own alcohol (so none of your guests have to pay) and hire a bartender to serve. Bartenders are trained to identify people who are completely inebriated and to not serve alcohol to them anymore.

If your concern is people getting drunk, a cash bar won’t stop them lol. The people who are determined to get plastered will do it on their own dime (they’ll resent you for them having to pay for it lol, but they’ll still get drunk). Pay for the alcohol for your guests because it’s the right thing to do (especially if you can buy it in bulk from a liquor store it won’t cost you much... we spent about $200 on alcohol for our 23 person rehearsal dinner, and only maybe like 60-70% of it was drank), and then having a bartender is the best solution to making sure no one gets dangerously drunk.
- Reply
Dedicated October 2019
yung_coconut · on May 11, 2020 at 7:42 PM
Flag

Hide content
I think your decision will largely be based on what the numbers end up looking like and who your guests are. Are they light drinkers, or heavy drinkers? In my personal experience, I would avoid Option 3 at all costs.
I went to a wedding a few years ago that did a serve-yourself bar. I think before dinner, the bride and groom had some friends serving alcohol (beer, wine and mixed drinks). Then they had a bottle or two of wine at the dinner tables so you could get yourself another drink during dinner. At some point, the bar became serve-yourself. Most of the guests maybe had another drink and that was it. But the other guests... Basically, a handful started drinking directly from wine bottles and got way too drunk. They started passing out whole bottles of wine and liquor to each other and their friends and it basically got really trashy really quickly. People getting really drunk, people fighting and arguing, unresolved college drama being brought up, etc. Super uncomfortable and a lot of people, including myself, left early. Not saying your guests would do that, but if there are a few who might party harder than others, avoid Option 3.
- Reply
VIP January 2020
Vicky · on May 12, 2020 at 2:31 AM
Flag

Hide content
Legally you cannot hire a bartender to charge your guests for alcohol unless you pay a lot of money for a special license. Etiquette wise you absolutely should not do so anyway.
- Reply
Master October 2019
Meghan · on May 12, 2020 at 9:51 AM
Flag

Hide content
I would purchase beer and wine, then hire licensed bartenders to serve it. They will cut off anyone who they feel is too intoxicated, you will save money by only providing beer and wine, and your guests won't have to pay anything. Everyone wins.
- Reply
Expert December 2020
Kayse · on May 13, 2020 at 3:01 PM
Flag

Hide content
I'm doing a mix of the two: supplying my own alcohol and hiring a bartender to serve. I don't want people serving themselves. Maybe it would help them drink less if they have to go through another party?
- Reply
Beginner November 2020
Morgan · on May 13, 2020 at 4:46 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Have you found a bartender yet?
I've talked with a couple but we don't have it in the budget for $500 for a tender, not including alcohol or other non alcoholic drinks.
- Reply
Expert December 2020
Kayse · on May 14, 2020 at 9:41 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment

No; I'm kind of stalled on planning right now. Can you hire an acquaintance to do it? I might go that route.
- Reply
Beginner November 2020
Morgan · on May 14, 2020 at 10:02 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
I don't know anyone who's tended before. I would want them to have liability insurance to protect everyone.
I think we're honestly going to do self serve bottle and, with our coordinator, have a plan in place for if things get out of hand. We're also going to halve the amount of alcohol we were planning to buy but supply plenty of non alcoholic drinks.
Once it's gone, it's gone. We're also going to leave some of the food out so people can snack.
- Reply
Expert December 2020
Kayse · on May 14, 2020 at 11:55 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment

I have to get liability insurance for my venue. I'm also not planning on serving anything too complicated, so I'm hoping I can find someone who can do it.
Sounds like you have a solid plan. I think limiting the alcohol and providing food the whole time will definitely help.
- Reply
Beginner November 2020
Morgan · on May 14, 2020 at 11:59 AM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
Our venue already has insurance so I'm not sure if we need additional insurance or not. I'll have to talk with my coordinator about that.
I hope you can find someone to do it!
- Reply
Expert December 2020
Kayse · on May 14, 2020 at 12:00 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment

If you did it probably would have been in your contract. Thank you! I hope so too!
- Reply

Master October 2022
Jana · on May 15, 2020 at 4:25 PM
Flag

Hide content
Some bartenders will allow you to provide your own drinks. But they require their services for liability and legal reasons. If you are serving alcohol in your own home, a bartender is optional. In a public setting, it is a requirement because they are preventing people from drinking too much and minors from accessing the alcohol.
- Reply