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Just Said Yes November 2019

Bailing on a bachelorette weekend

Kittymeowmeow, on June 7, 2019 at 6:43 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 9

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Hello WeddingWire world. I wanted to get your advice. I am getting married in November and my friend is getting married in August. We have been chatting a lot about wedding stuff and she has been there for me a lot. I’m also in an accelerated, extremely rigorous and stressful school program and she invited me to her bachelorette weekend which is 2 hours away from where we live. She told me about it a few months ago, and I’ve been so busy that i didn’t realize her bachelorette weekend is literally the weekend before my finals. I feel so bad but i just don’t see a way for me to go. I also don’t know if she’d understand because she hasn’t been in an accelerated program let alone college at all. I really need advice!!!!! How do I go about this? Is she going to hate me? Should I just tough it out and go for a day and drive back after? Do I ask her if I can do something for her after my finals? Or do I just flat out say I’m sorry I can’t go? Thanks in advance!

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9 Comments

Latest activity by Hannah, on June 8, 2019 at 12:44 AM

VIP June 2019
Formerbride · on June 7, 2019 at 6:47 PM
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I think she will understand! You can certainly tell her you can't make it but would love to do something after your finals. Go to lunch or get your nails done. That would definitely soften the blow.
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VIP March 2019
Yoice · on June 7, 2019 at 6:48 PM
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Oh I’m sorry this is happening to you. I think you can sit down with her and be honest about it and try to make it for a day at least. Bailing all alone might be a little too harsh specially if you’re there for each other and you want to avoid putting some tension in your relationship. I’m sure she can understand if you at least try to go for a day and then drive back afterwards.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on June 7, 2019 at 6:53 PM
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She shouldn't hate you over it, but as I've learned from WW, some brides take these optional parties very seriously. I would explain to her that you're sorry you can't make it, but you need to focus on studying for finals. If you want, you can offer to take her out for a girls night once finals are over. She should be understanding.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on June 7, 2019 at 6:54 PM
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She will understand. So my maid of honor is in a rigorous program too and she initially said she could attend my bachelorette day for only a couple hours as she really needed the time to study for exams. And so I said you know what, you can skip the day and it's ok (I mean I was kinda disappointed) but at same time I knew at that point she really needed the time to study and that it's ok we will make more memories later on
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Just Said Yes November 2019
Kittymeowmeow · on June 7, 2019 at 7:02 PM
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Wow, you are so sweet!!! Thank you everyone for the advice and quick responses! Very, very helpful. 🤗🙏🏼❤️
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Dedicated June 2020
Margaret · on June 7, 2019 at 9:27 PM
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I get your guilt, but focus on what keeps you going. I couldn't go to a bachelorette party last year because I was sick, like in the hospital sock, so I venmoed money for drinks and sent breakfast to where they were staying at. Shell understand.
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Dedicated October 2020
Kelsey · on June 7, 2019 at 10:04 PM
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I think it depends how close you are with her! If one of my best friends bailed on my bachelorette party last minute, I’d be pretty bummed out. If it was a good friend of mine I’d tough it out and go for at least a portion of it. Love the idea of doing something from afar if you do choose to not go, that could be a great alternative!
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on June 8, 2019 at 12:24 AM
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Please prioritize your finals!!! For the first decade of your career, your college degree can help give you can edge. Get the best grades you can. 👍
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Master July 2019
Hannah · on June 8, 2019 at 12:44 AM
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If your friend is truly your friend, she will value that your education is more important than her bachelorette party. I would tell her ASAP, and say you can go out and celebrate after you're done with finals.
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