Bachelor Party Expense

It sounds like there wasn't much discussion between the planner and the group. Maybe they can rework the plan so that it's more budget friendly for everyone.

Our best man planned a night at a hockey game. Best man was going to get my fiance's ticket, and everyone would get their own. Afterwards best man was going to treat everyone to dinner and drinks. All in all everyone else was going to pay at max $200 for the night.

Wow, this does seem like a pretty high price-tag when not everyone was consulted about budget and price points. Personally, I cannot imagine spending that much on a bachelor(ette) party, especially when there wasn't a lot of communication about the cost involved. Maybe he could speak with the BM first and see if there are some alternatives that can be worked out before he tells the groom that he can't attend?

It's definitely ok to say no. They should have been consulted about budget before it was booked.

$1,100 per person for a bachelor party is obscene! There is absolutely no reason for it to be that expensive. My bachelorette party is a 3 day out of town trip and will cost NO WHERE near that! I also think it is very rude that the party planner did not consult with everyone attending to see what everyone's budget was. I think it is fair for you SO to contact the planner directly and let him know that your SO does not feel comfortable spending that much money on this trip and he would have known that had he of contacted your SO beforehand. I also think it is fair for your SO to tell him that he can either come up with an alternative or he will be unable to attend.

I would absolutely back out as well. This planner has no right to spend everyone else's money without consulting them. If the planner gets upset, all your SO has to say is that he never agreed to those prices so there's no reason the planner should have expected him to come anyway.

I would explain it exactly the way you did here. You have expenses, are planning a wedding, and need to pay bills and eat and whatnot. You weren't asked if spending that amount of money was ok, and it's not. You can't afford to go. Even If the BM can't understand that explanation, I should hope the groom would.

That really sucks. We did 3 nights in Vegas at an AirBnB in Henderson and everyone was given options and opportunity to discuss in full. We basically told everyone if there was anything anyone didn't want to do or couldn't afford they could either just hang at the house/ hang on the strip, or we could split into separate groups I just obviously wouldn't be able to be in 2 places at once. 1 of my girls ended up coming in a day late to save on room expenses and the activity expense for the 1 night which we all completely understood. Another felt it was "inappropriate" to go see Thunder Down Under our last night in town because she is married...but that's a whole other story with it's own "wait, wha?!?!?!" moments. She just hung around the hotel, drank, danced, gambled while we saw the show and we met back up after. Everyone ended up really happy with the situation. Is there any way he could opt out of some of the events and attend others to keep costs within your budget? It might be the best way to compromise here if the planner is unwilling to adjust the itinerary.

It sounds like no one was asked prior what their budget was? Three of my bridesmaids didn't attend my bachelorette, and two of my fiance's groomsmen didn't attend his. He went deep sea fishing in San Diego so anyone that flew in paid about $1,000 for the weekend. He was 100% fine with people not being able to go and knew it was a huge expense. His best man gave 10 months notice for people to commit or not and booked things around 4 months out. My fiance paid for his own portion. Is there anything your fiance can skip out on that weekend to save money and still attend?

That is ridiculous! A party planner does not get to decide on an expensive party without consulting others, and then commit others to pay for it.

Hi Everyone, as most of you suggested my fiance decided to back out from the bachelor party because there wasn't another option really since he would have to fly there. He is bummed about it, but not bummed enough to drop over a grand on one weekend. I still amazed that the rest of the guys are comfortable dropping that much. I guess they don't have a wedding or student loans to pay for! Thanks for all of the advice!

We are planning a group trip to Vegas and it isn't that much.... Like what? Lol our hotel suite was a steal. The flights we are taking $150 of the cost per bridal party member so they might end up spending $250 for the ticket. Then we are doing/keeping it as affordable as possible while there. Everything is discussed among everyone. It's stressful af because I have had people complain either about cost or the flight times. I had one bridesmaid back out because she doesn't have a job yet after having her baby so they don't have enough expenses for her to go, which I totally get. He is allowed to drop out and not go! I made it known to everyone from day 1 that it was optional. I am glad he did what is right for his situation and yours. There shouldn't be hard feelings!