Aiyana
Just Said Yes September 2022

Awkward Save the Date Timing

Aiyana, on May 15, 2021 at 6:35 PM Posted in Planning 0 9
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Hello! I'm trying to figure out when we'll send Save the Dates. I know general etiquette is to send them around 6-8 months prior, however, there're a few factors that make me want to send them earlier.

1) 80% of our guests are out of town
2) Our wedding is on a Friday (aka even more time off needed to be taken)
3) Our wedding is over a holiday weekend (9/2/22)

So, I decided 8-10 months early is more appropriate. Perfect right? The only problem is that 8-10 months lines up perfectly with the Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Year season.

So should I send them out before this and pray our guests don't lose them amongst holiday cards? Or send them out after and risk it being not enough notice? Help!

9 Comments

Latest activity by Sexypoodle, on May 19, 2021 at 1:10 PM
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    I would still send them at 6-8months. People always say to send mail after the new year that you don’t want to get lost in the holiday rush. They still have more than plenty of time to make necessary arrangements. A number of people do not have standing annual traditions for Labor Day and if they do, skipping a year isn’t like skipping Christmas.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag

    We sent our save the dates at the beginning of December thanks to my husband putting off making them since he wanted them to be custom made. We didn't have any issues with sending them during the holidays. However, I don't think you need to send them any earlier than 6-8 months. I would worry that too early would mean that guests would possibly misplace them or completely forget they even got one.

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  • Taylor
    Devoted October 2021
    Taylor ·
    • Flag
    Very similar situation! Our wedding is the Friday of Columbus Day weekend (some say holiday, some say not), but over 75% of our list is out of town and work full time. I sent our Save the Date’s early February, which was 8 months out. We only had one person not receive theirs. I’d say mail yours out second week-ish of January! That should still be plenty of time!
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  • Tone
    Devoted July 2021
    Tone ·
    • Flag
    I know with destination weddings you can send them up to 10 months in advance and thats what we did (because all of his family and a lot of our friends are out of town and even for my family it is a 2hr drive we considered it a destination wedding)
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  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    I think 6-8 months is still fine in this situation. Out of town is not the same as international destination wedding (if people are going to another country they need to coordinate passports, visas, vaccinations, and other details that need extra time; just driving a few hours or flying across the country doesn't require the same amount of lead time). I would send out your STDs anytime between January and March.

    Many people work for companies whose vacation runs on a calendar year basis, so sending out your STDs in January (no earlier than the 2nd week) means it will be fresh on the minds of everyone right at the beginning of the work year and after all the holiday craziness. That gives guests plenty of time to plan their time off and request a few extra days before a holiday weekend.

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  • E
    Dedicated August 2023
    Elly ·
    • Flag

    I actually agree with you on this because it allows guests to prepare/set money aside to attend your wedding and make travel arrangements. They will also need to book early with regards to flights and rooms since the holidays have these places fill up quickly. It would be a nice touch to include some hotels to stay at with your save-the-dates. I would send these just after the new year so that they don't get lost or accidentally discarded with the other holiday mail.

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  • J
    Dedicated November 2021
    J W ·
    • Flag
    We sent them a full year ahead of time (😂) because most of our guests are out of town, we are also out of town and therefore out of touch with a lot of people, and because I got tired of people asking me. No one said anything. The only thing that happened is we had forgotten a few random people and had to send theirs a few months later but they all understood, and that way we had plenty of time to catch up the strays! I'd say do what you want, no one really pays that much attention. But definitely don't expect even casual RSVPs or anything.
    • Reply
  • Ashlee
    Expert September 2022
    Ashlee ·
    • Flag

    I'm in a similar situation. I am also getting married in Sept 2022 and I plan on sending mine mid January.

    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    I think you’ll still have enough notice if sent after the holidays. In reality, guests don’t typically start making their travel plans 8 to 10 months out for a wedding anyway.
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