Aunts, Uncles decided not to come to wedding

I'm sorry that happened.

I'm sorry that happened. That was very inconsiderate of them. They shouldn't have RSVP'd attending if they weren't going to be there. I would definitely be upset too, but you can't change it so feel how you feel now then let it go.

I’m sorry that happened—that’s so rude on them. I don’t think I would personally make any effort to involve them in my life after that. That’s probably not the most mature way to handle it, but, at least to me, I’m not going to put effort in relationships with people that won’t make the minimal effort to let me know they aren’t coming to my wedding. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I hope everything works out for you!

I've noticed that weddings tend to bring out the best or worse in people. Whether it's family or friends, there's always someone who shows their true colors. I'm curious to know what your mom thought about they did. I'm not sure about your family dynamics with them, but regardless of that, it was straight up disrespectful to you. I would've been okay if they gave a heads up in advance to accommodate other guests or at least save money on a plate of food. The people that truly love and care about you went out of there way to be present on your special day. Those are your people. Those are the ones that matter. Those are the ones that will show up for you even when it isn't your wedding day. If it bothers you that much, I would ask why they didn't go to your wedding when they RSVP'd. I would definitely want to know their reasoning. Congrats on getting married!

View Quoted Comment Yes I think I will have to

View Quoted Comment Yea I think It definitely helped me realize who I can and can’t count on. So i now know who matter to and want to keep a relationship going with.

View Quoted Comment My mom was very upset but didn’t want to ruin my day by showing she was upset so she just assured me i didn’t need them anyways. I’m sure it hurts her just as much but at the end of the day that’s her brothers and sisters I’ll have to eventually run into them & i just don’t know how to act around them anymore Knowing i don’t matter to them.

Unfortunately some people don't care about others, including their own relatives. Moving forward, I wouldn't go out of your way to interact with them. If they happen to be in the same place, fine. But don't go out of your way to pursue a relationship they have no desire to reciprocate.

I'm sorry.

My entire mother's side of my family didn't come. The majority of them didn't even RSVP or acknowledge the wedding in any way, shape or form, because my mother didn't like the invitations, so they didn't like the invitations.
I know what it feels like.

But I had a great time, because I wasn't worried about drama, or toxicity, or any of that nonsense.

This tells you who *they* are, and how much time they are willing to give you. Go ahead and grieve the relationships, but take this as your cue to stop giving them *your* time.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Like a previous poster said, weddings bring out the worst in people. One of FH's uncles and his family said they couldn't afford to travel to our wedding and made all these excuses which was sad but we understood. Then a month or two later they decided to all go to Disneyworld (during covid no less, which was one of their excuses for not attending our wedding.) So yeah family sucks sometimes lol.

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Well, you both have every right to be upset. That was nice of your mom to hold it together on your big day. That must've been tough. I totally understand how you feel because I would be hurt too if my family did the same. Right now it's painful, but one day you will look back and understand the meaning of it. The hard part is facing them and confronting them about it. I hope doing that will give you peace and allow you to move forward with your beautiful marriage

View Quoted Comment Thanks everyone, this helps me so much!

Did they actually say they would attend, then no-show?

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Written by Judith:

Did they actually say they would attend, then no-show?

Reply: some of them said they will do their best to go and then booked flights to be at Mexico that exact weekend and some didn’t even respond to my invitation. Not Even a thank you can’t make it.

View Quoted Comment Not people you will miss much over time. Not warm and welcoming family. I am sorry that anyone would do it that way. How hurtful, for no reason.

My mom moved to a new city to be near her sister. Her sister now lives on the same street as her within walking distance.

We invited them to our beach wedding in Delaware. They replied no. They have been very close with me and I was really hurt. She was the only one who was invited of my mom's siblings (and her husband who becomes an argumentative drunk)

Then they had the nerve, later after declining, then asking if they could come. Better off, seriously.

I say, their loss. Didn't miss them and I am so relieved I did not have to deal with THAT drinking nonsense. My mom's friends came to the beach ceremony drunk. :/ But they were drinking and celebrating I guess. Happy drunks.

I would have a very hard time being normal at holidays after something like that. How hurtful.