Attending a wedding without a formal invite

I see the dilemma. I would be afraid that he didn't run it by the bride or something without the formal invite.

Sounds like you are what they call,,, tier 2. Don't go its weird.

No one forgets to send one invitation.

ETA: Meaning they sent out the first invites, waiting for declines and you were the B list.

I would ask your FH to get an invite from his co-worker so that you can formally rsvp. Think about how you would feel if you found out day of that you had extra people your FH invited verbally, without a formal invite. They need to account for you so make sure you rsvp.

I don't think I would go, you're just a butt in a seat and a potential gift since someone else couldn't go. Skip it and have a great date night with FH instead. You were clearly B listed and that's not cool. This is why people on here advise that it's a big no no.

Does your FH want to go? If so, I'd go. Why not.

It's his friend - so I'd let him make the call.

I didn't know if I was being unreasonable by not wanting to attend! Thanks guys. I'm also so worried the bride has no idea we will be attending and that wouldn't be okay.

You are right, I would not want to attend either.

If he would've handed him an invite I would feel better, but it seems like he didn't even do that.

I'm chuckling because in a different thread (I think the text message thread?) there was mention of a FH asking if a friend got an invite, and the bride pointing out that he never mentioned putting him on the list. Maybe it is you guys?? Lol

You were clearly B listed, like O&S and I said. Don't go.

I don't think that I would go...

I will say that I found out that my DH was doing this to people he was running into when we were getting closer to the wedding. After flipping a couple of tables, he understood that we aren't those people and if he want's to add anyone, they get an invite. So, two weeks before his two new coworkers were both given invitations and neither attended. I don't blame them for not coming and asked him how he would feel finding out we were after thoughts on someone's invite list.

I wouldn't go, sounds like you were on the B list...

I'm kind of dealing with this now for my wedding. I have a group of friends of friends who I have a lot of fun with but don't necessarily hang out with them without our mutual friends. I'd love to invite them to the party but don't want them to think I expect a gift or anything from them. Apparently according to everyone on here I can't invite them without sending a formal invitation.

Your FH is close to the co-worker. If he wishes to remain close (assuming they'll be working together in the future), go ahead and attend -- if you get an actual invitation with a RSVP card to send back.

@Katie, if you want to invite them why don't you want to send them an invitation? Sorry I'm confused haha

ETA: send invitations always. This is such a strange situation we are in now. Don't do that to your guests, take it from me.

I have been invited to a reception before, and asked to come after the dinner, special dances, etc were over. I didn't get a formal invite and I did not think it was strange because again, the couple were friends of friends. I showed up around 10 and we all had a good time. I don't understand why this is so weird.

Not the same as the OP situation I guess, since they are asking you to come to the wedding too.