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ShanynL
VIP September 2017

Assign duties to wedding party?

ShanynL, on September 6, 2017 at 10:01 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 15

What exactly does the WW checklist mean when it says we are supposed to assign duties to our wedding party? What specifically are they supposed to do besides eat, drink, dance, and stand beside me??

15 Comments

Latest activity by NeLeibelToBe, on September 6, 2017 at 11:20 AM
  • Nonna T
    Master April 2014
    Nonna T ·
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    It means they are smoking the crack; you have it right Smiley smile

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  • Rachel Langerhans
    Rachel Langerhans ·
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    NO! Ignore that step on the checklist. The wedding party has to do nothing but purchase the attire of your choosing (even that rubs me the wrong way and I disagree with it) and show up on time for our wedding. That's it.

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  • Tara
    Super September 2017
    Tara ·
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    My "assign duties" to my wedding party included telling them rehearsal plans and day of wedding plans, and leaving them the option to only attend things if they can, and are NOT mandatory. (Like nail appt, brunch, things I thought would be fun for all of us).

    I did ask a couple girls who had smaller SUVs if they would be able to help me haul some of the decorations on wedding day to the venue to pass off to my DOC.. only because I have THAT many decorations, but definitely did not assign them that duty. (ps they were happy to help, and I should also mention they offered to help in any way first before I asked).

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  • Cepski
    Devoted October 2018
    Cepski ·
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    The only duties they are "assigned" is show up and smile. Smiley smile

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  • Lauren
    Expert September 2024
    Lauren ·
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    Some people assign duties such as picking up the flowers to the wedding party. While I am not having my wedding party responsible for anything except themselves, I am assigning other duties to family members who have asked what they can help with. My one aunt is responsible for picking up the flowers (bouquets and centerpieces) and bringing them to the venue. My other aunt is going to pick up the cupcakes and transport them to the venue.

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  • Megan
    Expert September 2017
    Megan ·
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    Check the box when you have told them the time to be there Smiley smile Assign duties = where and when to be getting ready and/or at venue

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  • Vanessa
    Expert May 2018
    Vanessa ·
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    There's a lot of things on that list that don't make a lot of sense to me....it tells me I should have sent save the dates by now...my wedding is 8 months away...lol

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  • Abbie
    Devoted April 2018
    Abbie ·
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    And everyone wonders why we still have threads started about kicking bridesmaids out because they haven't "done their duties", being upset that the bridal party hasn't/can't help with x, y, z...when the website this forum BELONGS to even says it's a thing! (As does every other major wedding planning forum/website out there...)

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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Administrator October 2016
    Lynnie ·
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    What to wear, what to bring with them, what time to arrive.... Smiley smile

    Other minor duties are things like - who is holding your bouquet during the ceremony, who is holding the rings, is one person fixing your train, who is giving a toast? It depends on your wedding!

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  • JJAF
    Super October 2019
    JJAF ·
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    Assigning duties is telling them when the wedding is and what time. I think everything else is optional

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  • ShanynL
    VIP September 2017
    ShanynL ·
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    Ah ok. It makes sense @WWLynnie! They are just little things like timeline and outfit things! Thanks!

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  • Munchkin9218
    Master September 2018
    Munchkin9218 ·
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    It use to be that you would ask for small things - The Maid of Honor made sure she had the ring and the veil, the Bridesmaids might be asked to double check on the bride and make sure she didn't for get anything ETC. That's a little outdated. I would just make sure you clarify where they need to be and when, especially if there is a make up or hair artist coming.

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  • Carousel
    VIP October 2017
    Carousel ·
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    For me, it meant asking the Best Man, "You're holding onto the rings, right?"

    asking my MOH, "when it comes time for the ring exchange, can I hand my bouquet off to you? That seems to be the norm."

    Asking my mom, "Can you be in charge of bustling my train for the reception?"

    And asking my FG's dad, "will you be around to hang out with / supervise FG while her mom is getting ready with us?"

    I think these things are fine to ask (not assign!) people to help with. You can't do everything yourself! Although it would be entertaining to try to bustle my dress with no help lol.

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  • Hannah
    Super August 2017
    Hannah ·
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    When and where they need to be. Also depending on your wedding, asking the MOH to hold your bouquet during the ceremony, ask someone to help fix your train and bustle it after the ceremony. I know I couldn't do that myself. Oh and asking the best man to hold the rings.

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  • NeLeibelToBe
    Devoted June 2018
    NeLeibelToBe ·
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    One of the groomsman keeps telling me he feels bad for 'not helping with wedding stuff'. I have no idea what that means! Other than like maybe helping set up chairs the day of I can't think of anything he should be doing! It's kind of awkward because he wants to help so much I just don't have anything to 'assign'!

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