Asking people not to wear white or black

I think they will assume or know about the white part. because most people know that is the color for brides. but the black part is gonna be impossible - sorry. but most men's suits and slacks are black.

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Well no one will be wearing suits at our wedding, or slacks honestly

You can't really say anything. Guests know not to wear white; telling someone they can't wear black is kind of over the top.

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Yeah, but it's kinda my wedding and im allowed to be over the top if I wanted to

I don't think there is any polite way of telling someone you will fight them over clothing choices. And what colors represent is pretty regionally-specific.

In North America (not sure where you are), it's generally understood that no one but the bride wears white, so I wouldn't worry about this since it will probably not even happen. If one person is clueless and does wear white, other guests will probably give them enough side eye to make them feel uncomfortable.

Black, like PP said, is an extremely common color in men's special occasion attire. And for women it will vary regionally. But even in places where women might wear black to weddings, it's HIGHLY unlikely that they are wishing for a divorce. They probably just like the color and find it practical and flattering.

There's simply no polite way to police any of this.

You could ask people to wear clothes matching your wedding colors if you want?? That way it’s more of a positive like “please wear blue and green (or whatever your colors are) so we can all celebrate in style” as opposed to “don’t wear black or I’ll fight you” 😬

You can't tell adults how to dress. Your wedding does not overrule one's autonomy.

View Quoted Comment Being the bride doesn't give you carte blanche to control how guests dress for your wedding. That type of thinking is usually what leads to bridezilla behavior. Your venue and the formality of your invitations give the guests an idea of the level of formality of your wedding and they are free to choose what they want to wear based off that information. If you're not expecting men to be wearing suits or slacks, I'm assuming your wedding is more on the casual side. Black tends to be more formal, so I doubt many people, if any, would even wear black to a more casual gathering. Not wearing white, as others have said, is a pretty standard rule, so I don't think it's something you have to worry about. The person who is going to wear white will do so regardless of whether or not they were instructed not to wear it (actually, being told not to do something may increase the likelihood people wear it).

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I don't think this is a good solution. This is basically requiring that every single guest buy a whole new outfit to attend your wedding. Yes of course, some might already have green/blue/whatever, but there is no way to know what is in people's closets.

Far better to invite people you love and accept them however they look.

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Okay, so I was trying to be nice. "Over the top" is a $700 shoes, an ice sculpture, and a fireworks show to end the reception. Over the top, but hey, it's your wedding.

Telling people they can't wear a certain color to your wedding (other than white, which everyone knows) is controlling and out of line. I detest the term "bridezilla" but this is exactly the type of situation it describes. This is not something you should be fussed about.

The most you can do is maybe include something like "wear happy colors!" but even then, there's no way to ensure someone won't wear a pink top with black shorts or pants. Like everyone else, there isn't a polite way to do this.

Honestly, you're more than welcome to be over the top-- but that's a little too over the top. I also highly doubt that when you are in the middle of getting married, if you look out into the crowd and see someone in a LBD or black shirt, or black suit that you'll even give it a second thought. You have plenty of other things to focus on that day, why add more to your plate? It also depends on when you are getting married , and dependent on your dress code.

For example-- a summer wedding with a cocktail/casual dress code has less probability of having girls wear black dresses or men wearing black suits than having a fall/winter wedding with the same cocktail/casual dress code. If you are doing cocktail attire at all -- there is a chance girls will break out their LBDs because they already own one. Spring/Summer has a great chance of people breaking out more colorful and lighter colors...Fall/Winter has a better chance of people wearing darker colors.

If you're planning anything more formal than cocktail, I would 100% expect more people to wear black.

My suggestion? Don't focus on what other people will wear. Focus on you, your husband to be, and the love between you...you'll have a blast even if someone wears black or white.

We're having a very formal wedding and I expect a lot of guests to wear black. My maid of honor is wearing a black dress and I have both wore and seen a lot of people wear black to a wedding. I really don't see how you can tell people what to wear but that's just me.

I’m with other PP here...it’s a little too over the top in my honest opinion. Plenty of people wear black to weddings, which I’m sure they’re unaware of this superstition.

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Agree. Unless the dress code is very casual for a say a beach wedding where it's hot or a very formal wedding where the venue has a strict dress code for entry, there is no polite way to dictate what guests wear. That goes for colors too. Being the bride doesn't allow anyone the authority to police what their adult guests do and don't do.

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That may be true about the choices you make for your own wedding. But it's rude and insulting to tell grown adults how to dress.

Most people know better than to wear white to a wedding. People with sense, that is. As for black, it's an extremely popular color for a variety of reasons. I know I wear a lot of black, because it hides some of the more chubby parts of my body that I don't want to show. As someone else said, it's a popular color for men's suits/slacks.

Even if you decide to go ahead and tell people what they can and can't wear, you can't really control other people. They will do what they want.

If you truly cannot stand the idea of people in black or white, do not invite guests to your wedding. Or have guests, and say nothing. It is considered extremely rude to tell guests, or any family not BM or GM, what to wear, or not to wear. Let people know how formal or informal the wedding will be, and the weather or season for those travelling from far away.
And any health a safety things - no heels on a dock or boat, no loose and sheer clothing near a bonfire and such. But not color, or style. Many adults find it so irritating that hosts dictate tupe of clothing, that they will go out of their way to wear exactly what you asked them not to do. And if you say anything, will point to the rudeness of telling people what they can or cannot wear, a lose/ lose for you. It is your day to pick things you wand for yourself and groom, plus decor, music, food, activities and ceremony. But you have no input into what guests and family wear, and only pick the outfit ( not hair cut or color, or style, makeup, or personal jewelry) for your wedding party. Those are the usual limits.

Everyone knows not to wear white to someone else's wedding, so you don't really have to worry about that. But the no black is unreasonable, over the top, and bridezilla behavior. Black is one of the most common colors people like to wear for weddings

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That's not being over the top....that's being downright rude and controlling. Unless you are footing the bill for a new outfit for everyone so it fits with what you want, you are s**t outta luck. They are grown adults with their own styles who have been dressing themselves for many years....