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Beginner September 2024

Asking friends to be Bridesmaids?

Rachel, on August 9, 2023 at 1:24 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 3
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I am struggling with trying to narrow down who I want to ask to be bridesmaids. Specifcally I am struggling with one friend, we will call her Lauren, who is a newer friend I met at the gym (I have known her for two years ago). My struggle is that I met her through my gym class teacher and friend, we will call her Heather (who I’ve know for much longer) but I don’t feel as close too. We all hang out together regularly but I’ve know Heather for 5+ years. I am wanting to ask Lauren to be a bridesmaid but I am affraid if I don’t ask Heather too she will be upset. Should I not ask Lauren to avoid any issues? I know she wouldn’t be upset if I don’t ask her because we are newer friends but I really like her and we clicked very quickly.


I am sure many of you have also dealt with this? How did you handle it?
Thanks!

3 Comments

Latest activity by Kimberly, on August 9, 2023 at 6:24 PM
  • K
    Super September 2023
    Kimberly ·
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    I kind of feel like if you have a couple friends that you only hang out with as a group, there’s more room for hurt feelings if you ask one and not the other. Then again, selecting bridesmaids is all about honoring those closest to you. You should never feel obligated to choose someone you’re not that close with. Do you hang out with Lauren one on one or with other people so that you have a relationship with her outside of your friendship with Heather? If so, and especially if Heather knows you two have your own friendship without her, that makes it a little easier. Chances are if you’re not that close with Heather, she already knows that.
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  • R
    Beginner September 2024
    Rachel ·
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    Thanks Kimberly. Lauren and I do hangout alone without Heather however I am unsure if Heather is aware of that. I do feel like Heather also thinks we are equally as close and me and Lauren as I’ve known her for longer. I have also hung out with Heather in other group settings. This is why I am thinking it would be least problematic to not ask either.
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  • K
    Super September 2023
    Kimberly ·
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    Aww unfortunately given the circumstances that’s probably what I would do. Like even if you had four in your group so two could be left out together it would be easier. Weddings have all kinds of circles that you have to consider, and it leads to tough cuts like this but is better for everyone’s feelings in the long run. Maybe someone else will have a good suggestion for how to handle this more delicately, but I think this is the right call. 🥲
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