Amanda
Just Said Yes February 2021

Are we being treated unfairly??

Amanda, on October 20, 2020 at 6:48 PM Posted in Planning 0 14
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Hello! We are getting married on February 13, 2021. Planning a wedding during Covid has been stressful (as I am sure a lot of you already know). I have been pretty calm and laid back, it is what it is kind of thing. But something is sticking in my craw and I really need opinions. We have booked an all inclusive venue that is just gorgeous. When I saw this venue, I just knew it was for us. Anyway, part of our package (expensive package may I add) is that we get a "wedding extravaganza". It is an even they host, where we get to try all the appetizers, main entrees, and see what our wedding setup would look like, options for decorating, etc. We were supposed to go to this event in March, then it got pushed to August, then to October, now it has been pushed until January 20th. Less than a month before our wedding. I am trying to be understanding because of Covid, but the venue wants more and more money from us, but does not seem to want to provide their end of the deal. I literally cried when they told me I had to wait until January. My final details appointment is three weeks before this, where I already have to have everything picked out and finalized. When I expressed my disappointment, my wedding planner told me, " Well a crab cake tastes like a crab cake, what else do you need to know?" I literally felt like I had been slapped. I was naughty and started reading their reviews lately and unfortunately a lot of people are saying the same thing and are also commenting on how bad the food is. I get people can be unfair, but I am so uneasy. We are paying for the wedding ourselves, and I do not mind paying for it but, I feel like maybe they do not care about us as a couple and only the money. Am I being unfair? How would you handle this? Is anybody else going through this?

14 Comments

Latest activity by Mandi, on October 21, 2020 at 4:15 PM
  • M
    Super October 2022
    Michele ·
    • Flag
    Never book a caterer without a tasting first, and that includes when they are owned by the venue. Stand your ground. If they continue to work against you, forfeit the deposit and look elsewhere for a location that is easier to work with. Read reviews and get tastings before you book them and do not let them bully you.


    They are being pushy because brides generally don't blink when they are given information and they take every advantage of that.
    • Reply
  • Alejandra
    Super March 2019
    Alejandra ·
    • Flag

    Did your contract state that "wedding extravaganza" is where you will try your food, is that supposed to be your tasting to pick out your food? Or was it just like a vendor gala? That's what my venue called it where they invited people that were considering a place for an event, they had their preferred vendors there, it was a restaurant so they were passing appetizers and had food stations through out so you could try. You were able to experience these vendors first handed and then you could choose if you wanted to add them, etc. We had a separate food tasting where we tried a large variety of food, sides, appetizers, wine, champagne, etc. and chose our final menu off that.

    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    I would push back and request that a date be set, and soon - especially if you paid for it as part of your package. If they don't provide that opportunity, and it's in your contract, they would likely be breaking the contract.
    • Reply
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Yes, I agree with this. Try this approach.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar April 2021
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    OMG! That’s a bunch of crap! We have an all inclusive package with our venue & they have been amazing all the way (even during Covid).
    • Reply
  • Stacey
    Super May 2021
    Stacey ·
    • Flag

    Is the "Wedding Extravaganza" like an open house, where many couples can come at the same time during a specific time block to tour the venue, sample food, etc.? Or was it positioned as an event that just you and your future spouse would be invited to?

    • Reply
  • mrswinteriscoming
    Rockstar December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
    • Flag

    At the end of the day, the business’ sole prerogative is to profit through their business. How much a business cares for its clients differs but all I can say in this regard is not to take it personally.

    I can understand your frustration however I do not think the venue is necessarily being unfair if they’ve had to push back the mock-up for X,Y,Z reasons. I am quite surprised they offer this, I have never heard of any couple being able to fully see what their wedding would be like prior to the big day.

    I think you need to check the fine print as to the ‘wedding extravaganza’ and check how much flexibility the venue has with this inclusion. If there are strict parameters they have to meet (i.e. no later than 3 months before the wedding) then you can try hold them to it or possibly negotiate a slight discount. If however they do have flexibility with when the event is hosted, and whether they even host it in the first place, then you won’t have much recourse in the circumstances. Good luck!

    • Reply
  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I agree with this advice as well. If this is in your contract, then you have very solid ground to stand on.

    • Reply
  • B
    Dedicated April 2021
    Bridget ·
    • Flag
    I would be feeling some kind of way too. My venue is all inclusive and though they don't have a wedding extravaganza like yours I cant complain about their timing on everything even with covid. They set me up for a taste testing for 4 days after I made my deposit and booked the place.
    • Reply
  • Kaysey
    Super February 2020
    Kaysey ·
    • Flag

    I don't think you're being unfair at all. If it were me, I'd look back through my contact and see exactly what it says about the "wedding extravaganza". See if the contact gives you a time-frame of when this is supposed to happen for you prior to your wedding, and if it mentions anything about if they have to reschedule it and go by that. If it say something in your favor, bring it up to the venue coordinator. If it does not and basically says the venue can do whatever they want with it, then you're unfortunately stuck on that front. When it comes to the attitude of the coordinator, unfortunately there is nothing you can do about that other than write a review or contact someone above him/her about their attitude. However, I would not recommend this until after your wedding to eliminate the chance of them doing something to intentionally ruin your day as retaliation if they are reprimanded for their behavior based on your conversation with the person above them (I'm not saying they would, I just personally wouldn't risk it).

    From what I have heard, a lot of people have issues with their venues or venue coordinators. I am very grateful that I was one of the lucky ones who had a great experience with my venue, their coordinator and all of our vendors. I sincerely hope that you are able to get this straightened out and have a fantastic and beautiful wedding day! Smiley heart

    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Master October 2019
    Meghan ·
    • Flag

    How much of a deposit would you lose if you backed out and chose another venue? If it is not a terrible amount of money, I would let them know that due to them continuing to push this event back you are going elsewhere. It does not sound like they are at all accommodating to you and I would not want to get married somewhere like that.

    Also, your wedding planner sounds like a jackass.

    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Just Said Yes February 2021
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Ok, I will try to answer everyone's questions, and thank you to everyone who has responded. I felt like I was justified to be upset, but the fear of being a nasty bridezilla has kept my mouth shut. So, we are half paid off to the venue, so we are $7,000 in at this point. We have had our date booked at this venue since the beginning of January. If I was to switch venues I would lose all of that money. I pulled my contract last night, and there is not one word in there about a wedding extravaganza. I did find out that they have been hosting the extravaganzas to other couples, in fact they had one last week that we were not invited to. One week after I was asking why we have not been to one yet. The coordinator keeps telling me it is not safe to have them...but you are hosting weddings every day? And had one last week? This company owns 25 venues in Colorado, who all use the same caterer. Out of all those places, we can't get in to any of them? I am afraid to throw a fit because of retaliation. But at this point, I feel like they don't care about my wedding and will probably ruin it anyway. (Which might not be true, but I just feel really down about this right now). When the coordinator spoke to my Mom (who is PISSED), she said they are working on something for us, so hopefully my fears will be eased soon.

    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag
    I think you're being a little unfair because many things are being pushed back because of Covid. We were scheduled to originally have our tasting in October and now ours will be in January also for a March wedding. Obviously I don't like that but I definitely understand it
    • Reply
  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
    • Flag
    I dont think you're being treated unfairly. But I do think they are being rude.
    • Reply

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