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Just Said Yes October 2014

Are ceremony readers required at rehearsals/rehearsal dinners?

Private User, on August 4, 2014 at 8:11 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5
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Hi everyone,

Just looking for some advice around what to do here. We were planning on inviting our ceremony reader and her fiance to the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. Her fiance actually lives abroad and is France so he's unable to make the rehearsal or the dinner since he will have to fly in the morning of the wedding which is totally understandable. However, is it still acceptable for us to except the ceremony reader to attend without her fiance? She will be in the area the day of the rehearsal so I don't really see why she can't attend but she is saying she will have to "call in" to the rehearsal. What are your thoughts on this and, really, in your experience, does a ceremony reader actually need to attend the rehearsal? Any advice/feedback is appreciated!

It may be worth noting (not sure) that although our venue is "in the area" - it is an hour away from where she lives. By in the area I meant the general vicinity of our state (Pennsylvania).

Thanks!

5 Comments

Latest activity by ...., on August 8, 2014 at 12:15 PM
  • Mrs.Temme
    VIP September 2014
    Mrs.Temme ·
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    I think your celebrant needs to answer this question for you. I'm not sure if I'll be inviting the readers to our rehearsal - can't remember if they were for my sister's wedding but don't think they were. I'm waiting to ask our priest when we meet with him. But my FH's best man and brother won't be in state for the rehearsal, so things happen. if someone can't make it, you'll have to have someone explain to them what to do/where to go before the ceremony begins. Not the end of the world.

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  • rusticbride
    Master May 2014
    rusticbride ·
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    I would ask and see if the reader would like to attend both events. I don't think it'd be the end of the world if they didn't, but they will need to have someone communicate to them on the day of the wedding about where they will need to be seated at the ceremony, when will they need to be up at the podium/standing up in general to deliver the reading, etc.

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  • rusticbride
    Master May 2014
    rusticbride ·
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    I'd invite the reader to the dinner as well. If they decline, that's fine, but they are a part of the ceremony, so I think they should at least receive a formal invitation to the rehearsal dinner.

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  • Karen
    Super October 2014
    Karen ·
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    We are hoping that our readers can make it to the rehearsal. I think of the rehearsal dinner as a thank you to the extra special people who are helping with the ceremony, readers included, so we are including our readers and their families in the rehearsal dinner as well.

    I understand if she really cant make it but I would just let her know that it would mean a lot to you if she could and that it is a celebration for her not just for the bride and groom.

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  • .
    Master October 2013
    .... ·
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    A rehearsal isn't even required, so, no, readers aren't required. If she'll already be in town, it's great to invite her but she doesn't need to make a special trip, you or a bridesmaid or DOC if you have one can fill her in day of.

    Our readers didn't attend, our officiant just said "We have x reading by jane doe" and she walked up to do the reading.

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