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Beginner September 2017

Any Catholic couples planning a non-church wedding?

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rp17, on January 2, 2017 at 12:26 PM

Posted in Planning 24

Hi, I realize only I can decide what's right for me, but still wanted to hear from other people who may have found themselves in the same situation. I'm really struggling with this. I'm trying to plan a rather short engagement (8 months) as I'll be turning 35 this year and my FH 39. We've already been together over two years and living together for one, and really I just want to be married already so we can start a family sooner rather than later given our ages.

The reception venue I've always had in mind is open in the fall, and we can have the ceremony there as well. The problem is, I'm really starting to feel guilty over the idea of not having a Catholic ceremony recognized by the Catholic Church. We were both baptized and confirmed, but are not currently practicing despite still holding our beliefs in God and Jesus. We want to get married in the town where my family has had a summer cottage since I was a teenager. (continued below)

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24 Comments

Beginner September 2017
rp17 · on January 3, 2017 at 10:59 AM
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Thanks for everyone's comments and support. I am calling around to a couple of other churches the next town over to see what we can do. I'm going to make an effort to get the church wedding (it's not what FH wants, but he's willing if it's what I want) - but if we're not able to do it in the time-frame we're looking for, I have decided I will accept that too and we'll try to get a convalidation later so that our children can be baptized in the Church.
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Dedicated June 2017
Ann · on January 3, 2017 at 9:13 PM
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A church is any space with two or more believers.. I am a confirmed catholic but marrying Lutheran.. we will have an outdoor wedding under the eyes of God within his creations, nature
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VIP May 2017
Erin · on January 3, 2017 at 9:17 PM
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I grew up Catholic and FH grew up Christian. I somewhat fell out of the church, just because of some changes in beliefs as I've grown older, but I still feel somewhat guilty about not getting married in a Catholic Church. We are getting married at a small Christian church, because it was still very important to me to get married in a church. I think as long as you know your relationship is steady and you do whatever you feel is right, you'll be fine. Even if that means not getting married in a Catholic Church.
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Dedicated February 2018
arkady82 · on January 3, 2017 at 9:45 PM
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FH and I are both Catholic and we ultimately decided to get married in the church. It was never a necessity for me, but now that we have decided to go this route, I can't imagine doing otherwise. I've spoken to a few churches and everyone I've spoken to has been very helpful. We plan on getting married later this year (probably September/October) and all the churches I have called have said we have plenty of time to do so. Call and ask. It won't hurt to gather all the information you can before making your final decision.
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