Am i being too picky about my alterations?

I don't think you are being picky at all. I believe she must have added the pads in an off position and not tightened the fabric around it enough. It is suppose to fit very snugged to the dress so once you put it on it is a like a built in bra and you have that perfect lift. If anything definitely agree that you should try some taping and cross fingers that they hold through the day and have back up just in case. Has the boning structure you requested helped?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=699d1KF6m2A

My seamstress placed the cups just off to the side a bit and that is how we created a subtle lift and cleavage. My dress also had boning, but no built in pads.

Without knowing the structure of your dress it's difficult to say whether pads could help provide lift and support, but in general you'd need straps to lift your girls up or a style that is tight around the front and back to push them together. The cups are only going to "push" if there is some structure there to fight gravity.

If your dress is a strapless style with a high back and a heavily structured fabric, you can lift your boobs by making the bust line tighter, essentially eliminating space for your breast tissue to settle in and forcing the breast tissue upward, and then padding can help fill out the underside of the breast to make it appear full. Padding is always going to add volume, so if you are used to the proportion of your breasts as they naturally are, adding pads will likely make you look a bit thicker/curvier, which may or may not be to your liking. If what you want is just lift and cleavage but not additional volume, you need to have the bust line taken in (assuming the dress style is one where the top line of the dress in the back is similar to the position of your breasts, or in the same place that a strapless bra would be). However this cannot be done with delicate fabrics, so if your bodice is made of illusion lace or something similar, it will be difficult to achieve the "fighting gravity" effect. If you have smaller breasts and want a little volume, pads can be added, but you'll still need to make sure the bust line is appropriately snug in order to push your breast tissue up and create cleavage. If you have very little breast tissue to begin with it will be difficult to get much cleavage at all.