Am i being a bridezilla

Nope. Not being a bridezilla. It’s your wedding, and it sounds by what you’re saying, you’re the one footing the bill. Are they contributing as well? If not, I think No $$$ = No say.

Wha??? They are being guestzillas. Completely unreasonable. Your FH should be running interference since they're part of his bridal party and presumably closer to him

People should be seated with their dates/families for dinner. It's rude to split up couples. That's why head tables are problematic. I'd suggest a sweetheart table for just you and your spouse, or a kings table with your wedding party and their dates.

In any case, this is up to your fiancé to negotiate.

I agree with Erin,Willow.

While I think that head tables are outdated and couples should always seat the WP members with their spouse, boy(girl)friend and kids (if the event is kid-friendly), I also see the best woman and groomsmen as being rude and selfish since they initially accepted to seat at the heas table.

They should have thought about it, not necessarilly the day they accepted to be in the WP but when the invites were sent out... or before.

You changing the seating chart, a thing that's already challenging is a NO-NO that late. You're not responsible for the 'forgetfulness'. You already have 1 billion things to do and to think about, they'ee adults and it sounds like they're behaving like teens.

Have you groom sit them down since they are standing up with him and him being firm about it. Kind, respectful of course... but still firm.

Although you are the planner, I think you should take into consideration the age of the child. A 1 year old should sit with their parents, or you're going to have a tantrum you cannot control. Your mother shouldn't be a babysitter at the kids' table, she should enjoy your wedding. Your head table doesn't have to include everyone in the wedding party like its a show. A child needn't sit up there either. If they've declined to be in the wedding party, let your guests sit as a family with everyone else. You can even nix the head table altogether. I doubt your florist already ordered the flowers this early. Remove the charge or repurpose the flowers elsewhere. I, too, think headtables are outdated and disruptive to families.

I don't think parents should be forced to sit separately from their children if that makes them uncomfortable. Especially a 1-year old.

As a parent, I'd be uncomfortable having my children sitting away from me especially at a formal event like a wedding. While I think they could have approached this better, I think you should also be more understanding of that from your guests with children, especially young ones.

No matter who's "right" in this situation, I think this is something the groomsman should have brought up well before the month of your wedding. Is it possible to delegate this stuff to your FH? They're on his side of the wedding party.

I disagree with some of the above - head tables are fine. We're doing one and all the spouses /partners of our wedding party are being seated at the same table together. We're also having a kids table, of which all of the kids are involved with out wedding in some way shape or form.

Now that being said, the youngest kid at our kid table is going to be 7. If children were 5 or under, I would sit them with at least one parent or relative that would want to be with them (grandparent/aunt/uncle etc). Teeny Tinies have to have a bit more consideration, but from what it sounds, they are expecting all of their children to stand up with them during the ceremony and are not even okay with them sitting in the front row (easily accessible if something happens) while the 1 year old is up with them.

That's unreasonable. And depending on the age of their children, demanding you change your entire seating chart is also unreasonable. But I agree with everyone - your fiancé needs to step in major. These are his people and he needs to back you up and take control.

Head tables ARE fine, as long as the people are seated with their dates. The old style head table where all the wedding party are sitting up front while dates are elsewhere eating dinner solo has gone out of favour.

View Quoted Comment Yes all dates are included at the head table and I had the school aged kiddos at the kids table that is directly in front of the head table so we can all keep an eye, my daughter will be at kids table and I’ll want to keep an eye on her as well. Bringing the girls up to the ceremony rather than the first row seems too much of a request. All the toddlers/babies are sat with moms and dads.

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OK so that's good!

I'm confused then. So the Mom and Dad and the 1 year old are sitting at the head table? Their school-aged older girls are sitting in the front row with your Mom? The couple now want their school aged kids sitting at the head table too?

If that's the case I'd just put the entire family together in the front row. Not everyone in the wedding party needs to be at the head table. It's not like a rule.

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This seems like a perfectly reasonable set up to me. If they're school-aged, they have lunch at school without mom and dad sitting right next to them, so they should be able to sit and have dinner with nearby supervision. It would probably be more fun for them as well (assuming all the kids get along with each other).

I could maybe understand wanting to be seated with their kids for the reception (had they asked more than a month ahead of time BEFORE the seating chart was made), but it's definitely way out of line for them to ask that all of their kids stand up with them at your ceremony. It was incredibly accommodating of you to let the 1 year old be up with them AND to give the front row to their kids as well. This is your wedding, not their family's event.

Wait, are you talking about the ceremony? Is the one year old in the ceremony? That does seem really really gracious of you to allow that.