Alternatives to cocktail hour?

This all sounds fine, except I recommend looking into the details of a black tie wedding before committing to that aspect of it. A “black tie event” is more than just a dress code... it’s a specific type of event and if you aren’t intending to host that type of event, then you shouldn’t say “black tie.” For example, a black tie event would ALWAYS have an open bar (with alcohol). So that alone would make your wedding not black tie.



There is NOTHING WRONG with not serving alcohol and with having lawn games and such! That sounds really fun and I’m sure your wedding will be great... I’m just saying maybe don’t call it black tie because people will expect a certain level of formality and certain level of service if you say that. You could always just request “formal” attire or even say “black tie optional” and that’ll let you off the hook for meeting all the black tie criteria.

Oh my gosh Alice in wonderland and a tea bar just sound really awesome! I do kind of think if you add lawn games it does make it not so much black tie but honestly I wouldn’t care aha because the tea bar sounds awesome

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Good point. Formal would be more appropriate!

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I just hate for the kids to be bored! My fiance and I have two kids ourselves, so all our friends have kids. Formal event would be more appropriate.

View Quoted Comment Yeah for my wedding I had a game table. It haD all sorts of table and board and card games and coloring activity books for children

We alternating it with Afternoon Tea Party.

I love it! Are you planning on having hor d'oeuvres?

Serving tea instead of alcohol sounds lovely, and is on point with your theme.
We are having a dry wedding so we are planning on a tea/coffee hour. Having some nice tea sandwiches and baked goods for appetizers to go perfect with it.

View Quoted Comment We’d have tea cakes and tarts and finger sandwiches.

View Quoted Comment Yes! Glad it doesn’t sound silly! I have some tarts and cakes to go along with our colors as well as lemonades for those that don’t drink tea.

View Quoted Comment I love this idea! It’s so unique, you should totally do it!

Serve lemonades too


Check Pinterest for ideas

View Quoted Comment We are! We also have match lemonade to go with our colors!

I definitely wouldn't consider lawn games black tie or formal. If you want lawn games then I would reconsider what type of event you are actually having because lawn games are more causal whereas formal or black tie aren't as causal. As for the alcohol you certainly don't have to have alcohol if you don't want. I don't drink, but my husband does which is the only reason we had alcohol. I am not a fan of tea so I would offer other options like lemonade and water.

View Quoted Comment That’s why I’m asking for suggestions. We want to keep it formal, but don’t want the kids to be bored.

I don't think there's anything wrong with lawn games, a tea bar, and your choice to have no alcohol. Your wedding, your choice! But I don't see a way to do this and have a "black tie" wedding...Even calling your wedding "formal" would still be pushing it. Formal weddings these days almost always have a cocktail hour with appetizers and an open bar. Again, there is nothing wrong with your plan. It just doesn't sound particularly 'formal'

View Quoted Comment You could set up a kids table with coloring and games.

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That's why I am open to suggestions! We want to keep it formal just don't want the kiddos bored.

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We will definitely have to do this!

View Quoted Comment You could even have one that incorporate Alice in Wonderland.