Allowing babies/other children at the wedding

It's nice of you to be considerate of your best friend. And here's the thing, you've already stated that there would be no children, this has been in place from the beginning. So stand firm on your rule. How would others who have children that weren't invited feel if they see other exceptions to the rule? Just keep that in mind. But ultimately it's your wedding, you make the rules!

Well kids that are under age of 5 are not invited to the ceremony for religious reasons. I probably will allow kids at the reception. Most of my friends and family don't have kids and the family that does understands why for religious reasons.

Hilary why is 5 years old the acceptable age "for religious reasons"? I'm asking, not trying to be rude.

I think exceptions can be made for parents with infants in the case of child-free weddings. A new mom may be nursing and it's not as though a baby will be taking up a seat, eating food, or partaking in the bar. We are having a child-free wedding but making an exception for a friend who will have a 2 month old at the time of our wedding.

With regard to your friend, not seeing a baby is not going to make her feel her loss any less. I'm certain she thinks about her son often whether or not she sees infants out and about. Maybe seat the cousin and your best friend at different tables.

I second @lindseys question. Inquiring minds need to know lol

Stand to your rule of no children and express your concerns with her if it gets touchy... I'm sure she'll be understanding

If that's what you choose, just be prepared for the cousin to not show. Many moms don't want to leave their newborns just yet at that age, especially if breastfeeding. I don't think you're wrong for saying no kids/newborns. Especially since that's been your idea since the start! Totally fine! You just can't get upset when she doesn't show either.

Also, if it helps babies at 4 weeks old are sleeping 90% of the day. & can usually be quickly called with s boob or bottle

It's your wedding and if you don't want babies, you don't have to have babies. But understand this means your FH's cousin won't come and that part of the family may be upset.

That's very considerate of you about your best friend. I would stand your ground on this situation. I would talk to her about it, but be prepared for her to say that they can't come.

Can I ask when his cousin was due? It doesn't seem strange to me that she and her husband would be hesitant to commit to a wedding that was within a couple weeks of her due date, but then if the baby came earlier and after one month they are feeling comfortable going out in public, of course they'd change their minds.

If you're determined not to have any kids there, then stick with it. I feel like it's actually acceptable to allow infants to attend no children weddings but not older children because it's not so easy to leave a newborn with a babysitter. Other parents understand that, so I wouldn't worry about what other parents might think when making your decision.

I am not allowing kids at my wedding but for one nursing mother. I am not really counting the baby as a guest but I am seating her at the table that is not full. It is truly acceptable if that is what you want.

You concern about baby crying is not a valid reason. The baby will probably be asleep or the mom can leave if it does happen.

Your another concern about a friend who lost the baby is also not valid. She cannot forever avoid babies the rest of her life.

My point being is that, if you don't want to invite the babies, say no. If you do want to include/accommodate them, go ahead.

You should stop giving other excuses.

OP you are well within your rights as hosts to include newborns in your no kids rule for your wedding. However, when doing that you must also realize and accept that doing so may prevent guests to really want to be there from attending. So you have to determine what is more important, no newborn or certain guests attending.

So your BFF won't see other babies as she's walking down the street? On her way to work? Running errands? Going to a restaurant?

If you don't want kids at your wedding, that's fine. Don't make the situation with your BFF as part of the reason.

My sister brought her 1 week old baby to our wedding, and he slept the entire evening. Let your fiancé's cousin bring her newborn. Everyone will be fine.

She is going to see other babies. If you don't mind them, let them come; they'll sleep the whole time.

But why not the little kids? What is the religious reason?

Children and new borns are different . As a mother I'd never even dream of asking a new mom to leave such a young baby behind

She said she wasnt attending for the last several months and now wants to bring her newborn? That's annoying. I think that if your cousin is leaving her newborn home than his cousin can too.

I am not trying to be insensitive to your best friend here... grieving mothers definitely get a lot of leeway. My own best friend had a miscarriage, so I can empathize. Of course you don't want to remind her of her loss... However- she can not dictate or feel personally insulted by seeing other people's children. It is just inevitable. It would be wrong of you to ban children from your wedding just for that reason. And honestly, she is sad all the time- not just when she sees babies.

As for your cousin, you have to decide if you want her there or not. She is telling you that she can come, but only if she brings her infant. You definitely can't ask that her infant stay at home with a babysitter or that her husband sit out the wedding so he can be with the baby. She will most likely be breastfeeding and not able to pump yet, so that's just not realistic. Babies at that age mostly sleep anyway. But if you truly want no children then it's fine to stick by your guns- just know that the cousin is not going to attend.

If your rule was no kids, then stick to it! Very simple.

Stick to your rule. I think its weird that she said she wasn't attending all this time but then decides she wants to with a baby?